Page 11 of Cherish

“When we were trapped in my head, both Hudson and I could see the mating bond between you and me.”

Jaxon jerks backward, his body arching like I just hit him. I can’t see his face very well in the darkness that surrounds us, but I don’t need to see him to know that I just hurt him all over again. So I rush ahead, determined to say what needs to be said. Determined to make him understand.

“What I mean is, we also knew when it disappeared. It didn’t happen for a long time, and when it did, we were both sure you were dead. I couldn’t feel you anymore—at all—and mating bonds are forever. Everyone knows this. So when ours disappeared, Hudson and I were devastated. We both felt like we lost you, though in very different ways. And it took a long time, even after the bond was gone, before either of us so much as looked at the other person.”

“It doesn’t matter—” Jaxon starts, but I grab his face and hold it between my hands, effectively shutting him up.

“Itdoesmatter,” I tell him fiercely. “Because you need to know that both your brother and I love you so much. Neither of us would ever deliberately hurt you the way we did. We grieved for you, Jaxon. And we missed you so much. The love we have for each other—” I break off, shaking my head as tears form on my trembling lashes. “It didn’t start to grow until after we’d finally come to terms with losing you.”

I inhale deeply, then let it out slowly even as I step back to wrap my arm around Hudson and hold him as tightly as he has always held me. “I love Hudson with every breath I have inside me,” I say to both of them. “And I know he feels the same way about me. But if either of us had had any idea that you were still alive, we would never have gotten together.”

Because the words feel wrong even as I say them—Hudson is my mate, and I will always be grateful that we found each other—I add, “At least not until we’d all had time to figure out that the mating bond was fake, and we had a chance to come to grips with that knowledge. Maybe it seems ridiculous for me to apologize for this now, maybe it doesn’t matter to you at all, but I need you to know that your brother didn’t betray you. And neither did I.”

They remain still for several long, painful seconds, and I can’t help wondering if I somehow just made everything worse. But then Jaxon grabs me with one hand and Hudson with another, dragging us toward him into a group hug that feels like it’s been far too long coming.

“I didn’t blame you,” he whispers, his voice breaking with each word. “I didn’t blame either of you.”

“I know,” I answer. “But I also know it would hurt me to think of you cheating on me when we were still together. I don’t want that hurt for you, now that I know for sure it never happened.”

“I’m sorry,” Hudson starts. “I didn’t think to—”

“It’s okay.” Jaxon cuts him off, clearing his throat a couple of times before pulling away. “Everything that happened. It’s all okay.We’reokay.”

It’s my turn to nod even as I hold on to Hudson just a few seconds more. Even as he holds on to me the same way.

And when I finally step out of his warm embrace, I realize that we’ve made it. Not just emotionally, past the ugly, painful hurdles of our past, but physically as well, to the huge iron gates of the Gargoyle Court.

MyCourt.

6

Irish Is My

Command

“It’s beautiful,” Heather breathes as we come to a stop in front of the gates, taking in the millennia-old castle before us, all lit up against the darkness. “Where in Ireland are we, exactly?”

“Home,” I answer, because for me, that’s exactly what the Gargoyle Court has come to represent. My people and my home.

“Thisis the Gargoyle Court?” she asks, her face glowing with wonder as she looks from one end of the keep to the other. “Why would you ever want to move the Court to San Diego when you could behere?”

“Because San Diego is home, too,” I say, making sure to catch her gaze with mine.

When I do, and when she realizes what I’m saying—that San Diego is my home at least partly because she’s there—her huge brown eyes go wide. But then she grins and says, “Yeah, well, if it means living on these kick-ass cliffs in an even more kick-ass castle, then home—and I—can definitely adopt an Irish accent.”

We all laugh at that as I admit, “Well, just the ruling portion of the Court is moving to San Diego, so I’ll still be visiting here often, and you can join me, too. The main army is remaining in Ireland. This istheirhome.”

I walk up to the gate’s keypad and enter the combination, then push the heavy iron open. Even though it’s only been a few weeks, excitement thrums through me at the thought of seeing my people again. Hudson and I try to get over here as often as we can, but with school ramping up and assignments coming fast and furious, we aren’t traveling as often as we used to.

That’s another reason I want to move the ruling Court to San Diego. With all the degrees Hudson wants to rack up, I’m pretty sure we’re going to be there for years to come. And while all those degrees may not be at UCSD, they are likely going to be at schools up and down the coast. Going back and forth between Ireland and California isn’t practical, even with Imogen’s portal.

“Hey, I didn’t think about this when we were walking through a portal,” Heather says nervously. “But it looks pretty official in there, and I didn’t bring my passport.”

At first, I have no idea what she’s getting at, but when it hits me, I start to laugh—as do the others.

“You know, right, that Grace is in charge here?” Eden asks, running a hand through her bangs. “She can bring whoever she wants with her, whenever she wants.”

“Not to mention, paranormals don’t really worry so much about human laws,” Flint adds with a lift of his chin.

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