Page 73 of You, with a View

“You really, really do,” I whisper.

He sighs, pushing back a strand of hair that’s fallen from my ponytail. “Let’s keep climbing.”

The last half mile of Angels Landing is harrowing, so we don’t talk except to check in with each other. Theo stays right behind me as we traverse what is essentially just a narrow ridge of mountain with a thousand-foot drop. There are anchored chains to hold on to for most of the climb, but nothing else to protect us.

“You good?” Theo asks as we come to a section that’s chainless, just a six-foot expanse of red rock with the valley swooping below us on either side. One wrong move and we’re dead, literally.

I swallow. “Um.”

Theo’s hand comes to rest on my back, right under my cropped tank top. My skin is sticky with exertion and fear. “We don’t have to keep going.”

I force myself not to look down, instead focusing my gaze straight ahead, where the canyon seems to go on infinitely, the monolithic rocks curving into the horizon. It’s so beautiful that my throat goes tight. “I want to get to the top. I’m just scared.”

He lets out a shaky breath. “Me too. But I’m with you, I want to get to the top.”

I take one step, toeing out to the unprotected path.

“Be so fucking careful, Noelle,” he says, his voice deepening. “Take your time. Don’t rush it, okay?”

“Okay.” But the word is so quiet that the air snatches it away, and I don’t know if he hears me at all.

We go silent, not even words of encouragement shared between us. The last portion is a straight climb up. Behind me, Theo’s breath saws in and out, and the cadence of it, the fact that I’m hearing it at all, sends a supernatural calm through my body.

And then we’re there. The earth flattens out and spits us onto a plateau. It feels like we’re at the very top of the world.

I tip my chin up, hands on my hips, trying to grab my breath back. The sky is so close. If I could just reach my hand up, and Gram could just reach hers down... maybe we could meet again. It’s the closest I’ve felt to her since she died.

I turn to Theo to say something profound, but he cups my cheek in his hand and presses his body and lips to mine. It’s a soft, tender embrace. He’s winded; his mouth opens over mine for a few gulps of air before he pouts his lips again, giving me one plucking kiss, then another.

“Holy shit,” he breathes out. He inspects my face, devouring every curve and corner like he’s reassuring himself that we didn’tin fact fall to our deaths. Then he kisses me again, this time deeper. I grip his forearms, sinking into the feeling of him, the hard beat of my heart and the shaking fear and exhilaration in my muscles.

“Look at the view,” I say against his mouth when we pull back for a breath.

His thumb grazes over the plane of my cheek. “I am.”

He holds me in his gaze for a beat, and right then, I know he really sees me. Then he turns, dropping his hand from my face as my chest swells, curling an arm over my shoulders so we can take it in together.

The sky is an endless, sun-bleached blue, the earth split into two beneath it. The canyons on either side are an ombre of red, pink, orange, and white, topped with trees. They’re massive, jagged, and ancient, layered from millions of years of microscopic, patient movements interrupted by cataclysmic events. It feels like life, those slow, steady moments of everyday routines, and the cracks made by life-changing things: love, death, other losses.

“God, I miss this.”

I look over at Theo, at the wonder painted on his face. “What?”

He gestures out in front of us. “This. Traveling. Living. I don’t know.”

“You haven’t been living?”

“I don’t think so,” he says, his eyes wandering over the view.

I don’t think I have, either. It’s certainly never felt like this.

I lean my cheek against his shoulder, scooting closer as his arm tightens around me. “All right, so what would Theo Spencer do if he were really living?”

His shoulder lifts in a sigh. “I’d do this, but for longer. Travel all over the place.”

The image plants itself inside my head, though I have no rightto think it: my sand-crusted skin pressed up against Theo’s on some beach, a sweating drink next to each of us, tasting the ocean on his lips. Exploring new cities on the other side of the world together. Future things we haven’t agreed to.

Theo brushes his fingers along my bare shoulder, bringing me out of my secret thoughts. “You gonna take some pictures?”