Page 75 of Baby For The Billionaire Silver Fox

“OhGod,ohGod,”I breathed, gulping in air as I drove frantically away from the coffee shop. By the time I got to work, beads of sweat had formed on my brow, and I was panicking. I should have told him. Or—I should have triedharderto tell him. I should have told him right away. And really, I should have just stayed the hell away from him.

At first, I did think we could be friends. He was a great guy who was fun to be around. But then I spent more time with him and got to know him. I developed some feelings and tried to stay away, but I couldn’t resist. I was like a moth drawn to the flame, and he was the bright hot fire that lit up my world. I’d fallen in love with him and tried to steal as much time with him as possible before being rejected. I soaked him up while at the same time feebly trying to push him away. In the beginning, I wanted him to be my friend—legitimately—but that had all changed.

Dan was a good man, and I knew he cared for me too. And I’d hurt him. What a mess I’d made of it, selfishly wanting him. Maybe I was just like my parents—top-shelf selfish to the core.

I thought about the life inside me, and my heart did an extra thump. Maybe I should give this baby up for adoption. She deserved better.

I shook my head violently.Stop it, I told myself.Don’t go there. I already loved this baby, and she and I would stick together. I swiped at my tears, pulled myself together, and walked into the hospital to work my shift.

I was glad the floor was busy today, so I had somewhere else for my mind to be. I could not afford to give the patients less than one hundred percent of my attention, and I was glad for that focus. Otherwise, I wasn’t sure I could have gotten through the day.

I’d finally squeezed in a lunch break, but I wasn’t that hungry. For the baby’s sake, I made myself eat and tried to concentrate on what lay ahead of me with my patients rather than think of Dan.

Me: Lex, are you free tonight? Can you come over after I get off work. I need to talk to you.

Lexi: Sure. You know I’m always happy to be your support buddy. Actually, me and Buddy can be your support buddies. What’s up?

Me: I’ll save it for our talk. I’ve got to get back to work

Lexi: Okay, sweetie. I’ll see you then.

“She did what? That bitch!” Lexi said in indignation when I told her how the whole conversation went down.

“Eh, she’s a bitch, but I’m something worse. I should have told him. I did try a few times. One time he wouldn’t let me talk, and I was distracted by what his hands were doing to me. The other time I went over to his place to tell him, and that’s when Buddy disappeared. But I should have tried harder.” I wanted to pull my hair out.

“What a horrible way for him to find out—from his jealous ex-wife and not me. Damn it.” I moaned. I rocked back, thumping my head repeatedly on the wall.

“Stop that,” Lexi said firmly and hugged me fiercely. I leaned on her shoulder, letting the tears fall.

“I don’t know what to do now, Lexi,” I said in a jagged voice that wasn’t mine. I felt guilty, sad, and heartsick. “I should see if I could end my contract here early and move to the next job.”

“Shhh,” Lexi said. “I think we should have a family talk. It’s time to read Nana into this, don’t you think?”

I nodded my head and hiccupped. I’d never had a real family, let alone a family talk. It sounded wonderful. My tears started again.

Lexi: Nana, meet us in the living room. You, me, and Nicole need to have a family meeting.

Nana: If you’d get off your phone and poke your head downstairs, you’d see I was already in the living room.

Lexi: I hope you’re not going to be grouchy. We need your wisdom, not your attitude.

Nana: Kinda the same thing. #truth #oldpeoplestillgotit #nanawisdom #nanatude #girlpower

“Geez, Nicole, did you have to teach Nana about hashtags?” Lexi complained, shoving her phone into her pocket. “She’s downstairs. Let’s go.”

She reached over and took my hand, holding it as we walked down the stairs. It made me think of two little girls walking home from school, and it comforted me a little. Buddy followed us down. He wanted to be in the middle of whatever was going on, even if it meant whacking us with his big cone when he tried to look at each of us and follow the conversation.

Nana called out from the kitchen. “I’m making us some tea. Come on in here.”

She looked at me kindly as she motioned us to sit. I’m sure I looked as awful as I felt. My eyes felt puffy, and my face was splotchy.

“Hot water for the tea will be ready in a jiffy. Not much can’t be hashed out around the kitchen table with tea and a sweet treat. We’ve got some of Lexi’s lemon bars.”

We sat dutifully. Any other time I would have immediately downed two lemon bars before coming up for air, but I just picked at one listlessly. No amount of Lexi’s baking was going to make this all right.

Buddy pushed himself in between chairs to get under the table. He stepped on my feet a few times before he lay down on top of them, satisfied he was in the best spot for crumbs.

Nana poured the tea and sat down across from us. She took her glasses off, pushed up her sleeves, and noted the look on my face. I wondered how many family meetings had taken place around the table in this cheery kitchen. The room looked worn around the edges, and yes, it was going to be renovated to be bigger and brighter, but I hoped it would still have the same atmosphere and not lose the memories that lingered here.

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