“Me too. She would have liked you.”
“Well, I should get in the house and ruin Nana’s fun now. You know she’s watching us from her window, don’t you?”
He looked at the house and chuckled. “Sweet dreams. Have a great day at work tomorrow.” He was one of the few people who could sayhave a great day at work tomorrowand sound like they sincerely meant it.
I gave him another quick hug and went in. “Show’s over, Nana!” I called out as I passed her bedroom.
I read a few pages of my pregnancy book in bed but couldn’t keep my eyes open. I gave up and turned out the light, only to feel wide awake and unable to sleep. Buddy was by my feet, with an occasional twitch and tail thump. I wondered if he was chasing a squirrel or enjoying a dog treat in his dream.
I tossed and turned, knowing I had to tell Dan about the baby. Oh, but I so badly didn’t want to. Shit. I was disgusted with myself. Here he was, thinking I was an amazing person despite my lack of upbringing. I wasn’t amazing at all. I wanted to live in my own little fantasy world where this new life I was carrying in my belly was part him and part me. Something we’d created together—in love. And knowing I would hurt him, that I should have told him in the beginning, was the worst of it. It tore at my core.
- 24 -
Dan
Isprawledonmycouch in the darkness and stared at the lights of the town. I couldn’t wrap my head around it. What kind of screwed-up mess was that? A kid having to feed herself, shop for her own clothes? Parents who didn’t ground her if she did something wrong—or gave her praise when she did something right. She was probably raised by TV and her friends’ families. No fucking love—she wasn’t wanted—that was the worst part. My heart ached for her.
I’d always had a loving home and supportive parents. I was even more grateful for that now as I compared my childhood to Nicole’s.
She could have gone down any number of wrong paths, but she hadn’t. I already had feelings for Nicole, but now I added compassion and pride to the mix. I felt horrible for her, but I was proud of her for getting out of there, going to college, and working in a profession she clearly loved.
I brooded late into the night, wanting to make everything better for her, then fell asleep on the couch. I woke up in the morning with a kink in my neck. Served me right, sleeping on the couch and using my arm as a pillow. I needed a massage, but I didn’t have time for that.
I walked barefoot to the kitchen. Coffee might solve the problem. At least it was worth a try. There was a knock on my door, and I yelled from my kitchen, “Come in. It’s open.”
“Big Dan!” I heard the voice before I saw her. Chloe burst into the kitchen, lopsided ponytails flying as she hugged my legs. “What are we going to do today?”
I picked her up and gave her a big bear squeeze. “I thought we could discuss it after your dad leaves. You can watch cartoons for now while I talk to him.”
“Sure. I’ve already got some ideas, like building tent forts, having a tea party, acting out Beauty and the Beast, playing doggie doctor…” she said as she headed for the TV remote.
“Those all sound good,” I said, and Bennett smirked.
I poured him some coffee in a to-go mug.
“I almost wish I could stay and watch the Beauty and the Beast reenactment.”
“It will be a closed set. Paying audience only.”
“I would pay money to see that,” Bennett responded. “But seriously, thanks for watching her, man. I have that thing I’ve got to oversee with the new project today, and the school closing for teacher service day is not good timing.”
“No problem. I had the day off, and she’s my favorite little princess.”
“Have fun then. See you in a few hours. Be good, Chloe.”
Chloe ran over and gave him a kiss, then yanked on my arm in excitement.
“Let’s build a fort now. We need all the blankets and cushions. This is going to be huge!” She eyed me critically. “Extra huge, so you can fit in it too.”
I pictured how that would look and started massaging the back of my neck. No more sleeping on the couch when I had to live in a tent fort the next day.
Nicole: Hey there, watcha doing?
Me: Hey. I’ve got a hot date here.
Nicole: …
Me: I’m babysitting Bennett’s daughter, Chloe.