Page 25 of Very Bad Things

“I’m not butthurt. And trust me, that’s not why I’m frustrated by it, not in the slightest,” I lie, knowing full well that’s exactly why I’m frustrated by it. “It’s just the fact that he has this arrogant attitude like whatever I say goes because I’m rich and powerful. I’m already a full-time teacher. Why can’t he find some other low-level peasant to pick on.” There is a lot of truth in that statement though. “And for as much as I love Daisy and I had a blast with her at my apartment, babysitting my students and going on vacation with their family is not part of my job description.”

“Speaking of, how’s the new job at Crestwood going? You seem like a completely different person than you were a few months back, packing up your life to run away to Paris.”

“I love it. Seriously, it’s great.”

“Good and for what it’s worth, I’m glad you decided not to uproot and move.” Xana knows me well enough that she knows she can either talk me down from the ledge or she knows she can wait it out and I’ll eventually find my way back.

“What are you and Ryan doing for Labor Day?”

“Probably the same thing we always do, spend the day on Lake Michigan with his family. You’re welcome to join us again. Unless, you know, you’re sailing the high seas.” She gives me a salute and it makes me laugh.

“How are things going with you and Ryan? Crazy to believe you guys have already been together over two years.”

Xana was put through the wringer for years before she met Ryan. She’d had her heart broken; she’d been cheated on, lied to, robbed by one guy and stalked by another. To see her smiling and happy with him brings me so much joy. She has the same kind of glow and giddiness talking about him that I did with Carson.

Carson wasn’t like any other man I’ve ever met. He was truly one of a kind with a heart of gold. He was empathetic and always anticipated my needs long before I even said anything. He was what the girls call a “golden retriever” man. He was innocent and loving and loyal in the most genuine way. I know that if life hadn’t ripped him from this world, we would have been that couple—the one who wears matching outfits with our kids at Disney and sends out our holiday cards with silly Santa sweaters and reindeer noses.

“Oh, Ryan.” She sighs, sitting back on my couch. “He’s wonderful. Things are going so well it almost scares me actually.”

“Like you’re waiting for the other shoe to drop?”

“Yeah, exactly.”

I reach over and place my hand on her knee. “Don’t think like that. I know you’ve been put through so much by your partners in the past, but Ryan’s different. He’s one of the good ones, so don’t rob yourself of that joy and happiness.”

She puts her hand over mine, smiling at me. “You know, I think you were my first ever soulmate.”

“I feel the same way. Sometimes I feel bad for the men in our lives.” We both laugh. “They know that if they mess up, it’s not just one of us they have to deal with.”

“You know when Ryan and I get married, you’re my maid of honor, right?”

“Duh.”

“Hey,” her tone gets serious, “will you be okay?”

“What do you mean?”

“Helping me plan my wedding someday.”

“Of course.” I hate that she’s always so worried about me when she should be excited for her own future. I know watching your best friend lose their mother and the love of their life in the same year and go down a long path of grief that almost consumes them has to be traumatic. “I promise. I can’t wait to help you. I can’t wait to sit with your mom when you come out of the dressing room at the bridal shop when you’re trying on dresses. Mostly, I can’t wait to give Ryan my very threateningif you so much as cause her a single tear, I will hunt you down and kill you with my very specific set of skillsspeech.” I do my best Liam Neeson impression and it has her in a fit of giggles.

* * *

“Okay,class, and what do we say at the end of the day?” I ask as a sea of smiling children raise their hands and say with me, “We are grateful for the day!”

“And for you!” Daisy adds on with a big smile, several other students joining her.

“Thank you all so much. I am so grateful for each of you and I love being your teacher. Are you all going to have a great weekend?”

“Yes!” they cheer.

“Does anyone want to share their weekend plans?” Several hands shoot sky-high.

“Bryson.”

“Me and my dad and, and, and my brother are going to a, to a Cubs game.”

“That sounds amazing! Danielle.”

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