“Her, I have to respect. You…not so much.”
Her jaw dropped. “Why not?”
“Well, for starters, you’re not my grandmother. Everyone else has to earn it.”
She frowned. “I really am sorry you felt you had to come all this way.”
“So you’re not sorry you did what you did, just sorry you got caught and I had to make the trip?”
“Well… Yes, that’s right.”
I shifted in my seat to face her. “My grandmother is seventy-eight years old. Did you really think it was a great idea for her to strip naked in public in the Bahamas?”
“Oh my God. You’re such a jerk.”
“I’ma jerk?”
“Yes. You have a problem with an older woman taking off her clothes, but not a younger one.”
“I didn’t say that…”
“So if I told you I wanted to find a quiet little area of the beach and take off all my clothes, you’d be okay with that?”
“It might be the only thing that could change my mood right now.”
Nora pursed her lips. “Well, then I guess you should get comfortable with your mood. It’s going to be around for a while.”
The bartender walked over and motioned to my drink. “You want another?”
“Double, please.” I shook my thumb at Nora. “Put it on her tab.”
She rolled her eyes. “Fine. And I’ll take a cabernet, please. Whatever you have open is great.”
“You got it.” He walked away.
“Have you ever tried skinny dipping?” Nora asked.
“Not since becoming an adult.”
“Maybe that’s your problem. You need to have a little fun.”
“I wasn’t aware I had a problem.”
“Oh, you definitely do. You’re an uptight ageist with a stick up his ass who acts like a dick whenever your grandmother wants to have a little fun.”
“Very nice. Do you kiss your mother with that mouth?”
She squinted at me. “My mother’sdead.But I do give really good head with it.”
Her comment caused a twitch in my pants, though I was still pissed off. “I’d ask you to demonstrate, but I don’t want whatever you picked up in prison.”
Nora’s pouty mouth formed a solid line offuck you. I waited for the comeback, but instead, her eyes dropped to my lips.
Is she fucking with me?Trying to knock me off my game by pretending she was interested, or was our arguing working for her? Or maybe I was seeing things. I had no damn idea, but I knew one way to find out.
I leaned closer. “You’re a giant pain in my ass.”
Her eyes widened, then narrowed to pissed-off slits. She glared at me for a solid ten seconds before she leaned over and crushed her lips to mine.