Page 37 of Legally Yours

“I love you, Cassandra.”

I nod.I love you, too, even though I can’t make myself trust you.

He runs upstairs to change into casual clothing. I hear the water running in the bathroom sink. He must be washing his face and running the water through that beautiful, blonde hair. He does have that habit of refreshing himself like that when he comes home. I love seeing sparkling droplets of water in his hair.

Tuck this away as another memory.

Before he comes back downstairs, I sniff back a few tears and take a deep, steadying breath.Tonight has to be your best acting job. Leave him a few good memories as well. I know he loves me because he’s shown me so many times. But my stupid head won’t let me trust him.

“Need any help in here?” Liam is sweet like that.

“Uh, maybe get the wine glasses down? I have a bottle of white wine there. Everything else is done.”

I pull the sizzling salmon steaks off the stovetop grill. I poke at them.Perfect.Next, I remove two large baked potatoes from the oven, and I squeeze them.Good. They are baked through.

Liam takes the plates and puts the food on them. He tests the beans and adds butter to them, stirring it into the beans. Then, he scoops some onto our plates.

I make sure that we have all the condiments we’ll need on the dining room table. Liam opens the wine so it can breathe. For now, we’ll drink iced tea.

“Man, this looks so delicious!” Liam raises shining eyes to me. His smile is wide.

I can’t look at him for too long or I’ll break down. “Thanks.” I decide not to mention the significance of the day. My heart won’t last if I do. “Why are you so happy?”

“We made it to the six-month mark. We succeeded.”

Oh, Liam, why did you have to say it?

I can’t say anything, so I try to smile. Instead, it feels like my mouth is wide open for the dentist to work on my teeth. We eat dinner, and I actually finish almost all of my food, to my surprise. “I’ll get the dessert.”

“Do we need plates and forks?”

“Come to think of it, yes. How was your day?” I ask.Keep the conversation on ordinary topics.

It might be working. I don’t feel like I’m going to cry and blubber all over the place.

“It went well, though I missed your presence.”

“Thank you. What did you do?”

“Hmm. Signed a contract with a new model, firmed up plans for our next show, missed you, spoke with two models who are falling short on their commitment to the agency, missed you and ate at my desk.”

My mouth falls open. “More model problems? What are they doing or not doing?”

“They show up late to work, come in high, and Candace picked a fight with another model.” He looks thunderous, but it certainly is a distracting topic to focus on instead of my breaking heart.

At bedtime, Liam carries me upstairs. I want him. I want to be with him my whole life, but I can’t. I take his clothes off, and he removes mine. We fall into bed, and I make slow love to him. I try not to cry knowing that it is the last time.

Liam is lying on his back, with his arm around my shoulders. His fingers trace light circles on my arm.

I lie so close to him that my entire body is pressed against him. I wrap my arm around his middle and just hold on.

“I love you so much, Cassandra.”

I swallow. I close my eyes. “I love you, too.” It’s the truth, and it hurts so much!He just made it so hard for me to leave. It’s better that I break both of our hearts now before something happens and he breaks mine.

Somehow, I manage to fall asleep. But I can’t stay asleep. I wake up, still holding Liam. I hear his soft, deep breaths.I’m going to miss all of this!I close my eyes, trying to find sleep again. Instead, I begin to cry. I keep it as quiet as I can because I can’t let him know that I’m sad for a specific reason.

So, I spend most of the night just saying goodbye to him.

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