Page 41 of SEAL's Surprise Daughter

She looked up from her computer and smiled. “How may I help you?”

“Hi, I’m here to see Matt Ryeland, please,” I said, smiling back. “He’s expecting me.”

“Sure.” She took my name, then made a call before pointing to a small waiting area in the corner. “Have a seat. He’ll be right with you.”

“Thanks.”

Sure enough, I’d barely sat my butt in the seat before a door opened down a short hallway and Matt came out, grinning from ear to ear and looking pretty much the same as the last time we’d seen each other—still tall, still muscled, still all long limbs and a piercing stare. We shook hands, then exchanged a quick bro hug before he stepped back, hands on hips.

“It’s been too long, dude,” Matt said, laughing. “You still look the same.”

“You too.” I grinned. “So, you going to show me around, or what?”

“Sure.” He gestured for me to follow him down the hall. “To what do I owe the honor today?”

I shrugged. “Just need a bit of a break. Thought I’d see in person what you’re up to since Im close by.”

For now.

“Cool.” We stopped in front of the elevators, and he pushed the Down button. We chatted about our history and our lives since we’d last seen each other, and when the car arrived we rode down to what I assumed was a storage basement. I’d just finished telling him about Savannah when the doors slid open to what looked like some kind of action movie secret training facility.

“Holy shit,” I said, unable to keep the awe from my voice. I’d been wrong about this place not being right for a security office. It was like security nirvana down here. He took my stunned silence in stride and showed me around the training rooms and target range and even what looked like an interrogation room, though Matt said it was a meeting space. Uh-huh. Sure. There was also a workout room with a full set of weight machines, top-of-the-line treadmills, a boxing ring, and heavy bags.

“There’s a more formal conference room upstairs, near my office, for meeting business clients,” Matt said when we stood near the elevators once more. “You know you’ve got a job here if you want it, when you’re ready to retire, dude. We’re teammates. I’ll hire any and all of you to work here.”

“Right.” I wasn’t sure what to say to that, so I just nodded.

But Matt apparently wasn’t ready to let it go. He kept pressing. “You’ve been in for ten years now, dude. And if you’re lucky you can go for another ten. But then what? What do you do after that? Take a desk job at the Pentagon?”

“I don’t know.” My feelings about all this were still too raw after the other night, and I didn’t want to get into it today, no matter how grateful I was to Matt for his help. “It’s not something I want to think about right now, okay?” I snapped, sounding harsher than I intended.

Matt snorted, his gaze narrowed like he saw right through my bullshit. “Hey, I’m just trying to help you out, man. We all have to think about it someday. Every SEAL gets there.” The elevator doors opened, and we climbed aboard to ride back up to the first floor. Matt raised a shoulder. “Just figured since you’d walked into a ready-made family, maybe you were getting to the point where you’re asking yourself these kinds of questions. I know I did.”

That earned him some serious side-eye from me.

He chuckled, then shook his head. “Fine. I met a woman. When I came home on leave. That’s where it started for me.” His grin grew wider by the second. “Now we have a son and daughter on the way.”

“Twins?” I asked, my eyes widening.

“Yep.”

“Wow.” I wanted to be happy for him. Iwashappy for him. But I was also sad and upset for myself, because of Savannah and the thought that I’d be leaving her soon. “Great news. Congratulations.”

The words sounded flat to my own ears.

If Matt noticed, however, he didn’t mention it. Just held the elevator doors for me to get off, then followed me out into the hall before leading me to his office. It was a bit cluttered, but then that was Matt. Always five million things going on at once. The guy always seemed to balance it all, though. I was never sure how he did it.

Matt closed the door and we sat down, him behind his desk and me in a chair in front of it. Then he cut through the shit. “So,” he said, steepling his fingers in front of him. A move I remembered well from our missions together. It meant he was going in for the kill, and my stomach lurched. “Tell me why you’re really here, dude. ’Cause I know you didn’t come all this way just to look in a mirror.”

I opened my mouth to answer, then snapped it shut again. All the emotions that had been roiling inside me since I’d first set foot back in Harpers Ferry—sadness, grief, love, loss, anger, hope—threatened to choke off my air supply. But I couldn’t tell Matt about that. Not with words, anyway. It was too real and vulnerable, and I just wasn’t ready. So instead I asked, “How about we go back downstairs and try out that workout room?”

“You got it,” Matt said, pushing to his feet again. “Come on. I’ve got clothes you can change into. Always keep an extra set handy, just in case.”

Twenty minutes later, we were in the boxing ring, gloved up and throwing jabs and punches at each other. It had been a long time since we’d done this together, and I’d missed it. Matt and I were about the same height and build, and our skills were well matched. Meaning when I tried to get him in a headlock, he’d already anticipated it and managed to get out of it fast. Same with me. We went at it for a good hour or so, working up a sweat and—for me, anyway—working out some of my knotted feelings. It was fun, and I was enjoying myself… until something dark and dangerous that I’d buried deep inside rose to the surface.

One moment everything was bright and in color, and the next it went all gray and shadowed. My chest felt tight all of a sudden, and I couldn’t breathe. Matt kept egging me on, throwing punches and weaving away from mine, and a red haze descended over my vision as my mind filled with everything that was wrong, everything that had hurt me, everything that I’d lost or fucked up in my life.

All at once, I wasn’t playing around. I was fighting for real, punching and hitting and struggling to defeat all the demons from my past and my present, fighting for my future and for a life that made sense to me again.

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