Page 78 of Someday

“I don’t think I realized until I was driving away from you all those years ago…that part of me always felt like we would never last,” I whisper. “That we would come to an end. You were the one good thing in my life, and something in me always knew my dad would eventually ruin us too.”

His fingers pause the trek they’ve been making between the valley of my breasts, and his Adam’s apple suspends before he swallows hard.

“My dad was getting reckless. That last year…he—” I shake my head, not sure of even how to put into words the desolation I felt. “I…don’t know. I’ll tell you more, Theo, I swear I will. But tonight, I just…I need you to know that I thought I was saving you when I left. Saving you from my dad, saving you from the mess I was…saving your future. It’s the only way I was able to stay away from you.”

I let out a shaky breath and his hand slides down to my hip, tightening his hold on me. It anchors me.

“Tomorrow. I think I’m ready to go to the house tomorrow and start clearing out the house.”

“Are you sure?” he asks gruffly. “There’s time. I’ll help you. You don’t even have to go inside for that matter. Tell me the things you want and I’ll bring them to you or donate them. Whatever you need.”

“I think I need to deal with it. I don’t want this to be what our conversations revolve around. The longer it drags by without me confronting it, the more it’s going to just magnify in my head. I know I shut down the last time I was there, but maybe I won’t tomorrow because we’re talking about it, and if I do, what’s the worst that can happen? I get lost in the memories and hide in the barn in the fetal position?”

He flinches and shifts so our bodies are flush.

“I’d rather you avoid ever feeling that way.” His voice is grim, and I smooth the frown between his eyebrows.

I could cry just hearing how much he cares.

“I’ve spent so much of my life pretending what my dad did to me wasn’t happening. Maybe acknowledging that he made my mom’s and my life a living hell in that house is the first step toward healing.”

“You’re the bravest person I know, Firefly.”

I roll on top of him and lean down to kiss him.

“I’ve always been much braver with you by my side,” I whisper.

“Well, I’m okay to stay right here, glued to you forever.” He pushes my hair back and stares up at me, his mouth parting when I lower myself onto him.

For the next few hours, I’m content to let our bodies do the talking.

CHAPTERTHIRTY

NECESSARY DISTRACTIONS

THEO

I have a light day and manage to be done with my appointments by noon, so I pick up Fred and call Sofie on the way to her place to see if she wants me to pick up lunch. It rings and I try again before leaving a text asking if she’s hungry.

It’s impossible not to worry about her. She doesn’t call or text when she knows I’m working, but she always answers my call if she’s able or texts back to say she’ll call me right back. She’s been quiet all day.

Callum’s supposed to come over later to talk with Sofie about what she likes about her stables, and he offered to draw up the plans for ours. She doesn’t want it to be just like her dad’s and Callum has told her what’s worked with his, so he can give her ideas for anything she wants to change. I’ve got ideas about what I like in a working barn, but I want this to be Sofie’s.

The fact that she’s living somewhere she never wanted to see again just to take care of those horses speaks volumes about how much they mean to her. I like to think I had something to do with her returning to Landmark, but she slept in a cot in the barn where memories of her dad are predominant…long before I stopped being a jerk to her.

I want to give her everything she wants. I felt that way when we were kids too, but it’s even stronger now.

I want to give her a safe place…beher safe place.

When I pull into her driveway, I can’t tell if she’s in the house or at the barn, so I stop at the house first. Before I knock, I hear the faint sounds of music playing and grin when I hear “Glad You Came” by The Wanted. We danced to that song at—I think it might have been our freshmenandsophomore dance.

I tap on the door and open it, following the music to the kitchen. She has boxes lined up against the wall, and I watch as she places wrapped plates in one box and a rolling pin in another. There’s a stack of boxes that are stacked near the doorway and I glance down to see placemats and tablecloths in the top one.

I knock on the doorjamb so I don’t scare her, and ask, “How’s it going in here?”

She jumps a little but smiles when she sees me. I didn’t realize how much I was holding my breath until I see that smile and let out a long whoosh of air. Her waves are piled on top of her head and kept out of her face with a black bandana. She wipes her forehead and comes over to give me a kiss and my hands plant on her ass, pressing her against me as my tongue does a lazy swirl in her mouth.

She pulls back just as it really heats up and pushes back on my chest with a shy grin.

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