Page 36 of His Reluctant Cowboy

“Why?”

“Because you’re a human being not a body. I...” Michael cleared his throat hard. “I was with someone for a long time who I thought loved me for who I was. But in the end, he loved me for my bank account. No one should be loved for what someone else can take from us.”

Those words finally gave Josiah the courage to meet Michael’s eyes. Eyes both sad and determined, and something deep inside of Josiah responded to that. Responded to what seemed like compassion and understanding when he genuinely hadn’t expected either. At the easiest, he’d expected judgment; at the worst, he’d expected to be bent over the nearest solid object and used. But all Michael seemed to be offering was...commiseration?

Maybe even friendship?

“Thank you,” Josiah said. He couldn’t find any other words and hoped they were enough.

Michael’s entire body ached soul-deep for everything Josiah hadn’t admitted to, but his silence in the last few minutes had said more than enough. So many truths in what he hadn’t spoken out loud, and Michael wanted to charge right over to McBride’s house and slam the asshole into the wall. He wanted to avenge all the hurts in Josiah’s past, and instinct told him there were a lot. Probably more than he wanted to know about.

Somehow, he stayed still and calm, because his first priority was keeping Josiah comfortable and reducing that glimmer of fear in his eyes. Fear that knew what a fast fist felt like. Or worse. And the “or worse” infuriated Michael in a way he didn’t understand.

“I don’t know your story and I’m not asking for it tonight,” Michael said. “But you are safe here on our land, and you have allies in me and my father, and the men I work with. I won’t tell them anything about this, because it isn’t my business unless it ends up on our doorstep. I just hope you can take comfort in knowing that as long as you are here, your body is yours. You are my dad’s caretaker and a tenant and that’s it.”

Josiah’s eyes gleamed, and if he started to cry Michael wasn’t sure he’d stay calm. But Josiah blinked a few times, then shook his hands out. “Thank you, Michael. I want to believe you. I’m just, um...”

“It’s okay. That’s why I’m way over here. And if you feel better about it, buy a second lock for the inside of the trailer to keep me out. It won’t hurt my feelings. I’m not a predator. This is your home. I want you to feel safe here. Do you believe me?”

“I want to.”

Honest. “Okay, then I’m going to go. I really just wanted a chance to talk to you tonight, without Dad around, but I see I misjudged things a bit. You settle in and I’m sure we’ll talk tomorrow. Lock up behind me, okay?”

“Sure. Right.”

Michael didn’t want to leave. He hated the wounded look still haunting Josiah’s eyes, but something in him said this was the best thing to do. To give Josiah space and prove Michael wasn’t some manipulative bastard who only wanted Josiah for sexual favors. Josiah had obviously been trading his body for safety and shelter for a long time. For so long that he’d expected the same deal from Michael.

A deal he’d obviously fallen into with the county sheriff. A deal that pissed Michael off, especially when the sheriff had been so fast to dump Josiah on his ass without his own goddamn belongings. He’d have a hard time holding his temper the next time he saw McBride in public, but Michael wasn’t a headstrong teenager anymore who spouted off when he was pissed. He was a grown man who could think rationally and calculate any move he might make.

First, he needed Josiah to relax and find the sense of safety he’d obviously been missing for a long time.

Dad was awake when Michael let himself back inside. “He settlin’ in?”

“Slowly, yeah. Part of me wants to start locking the front gate like we did when we had cattle. Especially while I’m at work.”

“If you think that’ll help the boy, fine. It’s gonna need to be greased up, though. Haven’t shut it in a long time. Got outta the habit after you left.”

Michael flinched, remembering why they’d gone back to locking it after selling the herd. “Yeah. I’m going to see what I can scrounge up for dinner. I invited Josiah in but he’ll probably stay in the trailer.”

“Fine, fine.”

He didn’t see Josiah again for the rest of the night.

Dad had been a regular churchgoer before Michael left, and he obviously couldn’t go yet, not until he was stronger, so it didn’t completely surprise Michael when Pastor Lorne rang the bell a little after lunchtime on Sunday. Michael wasn’t much for religion, so he excused himself outside while the pastor did whatever he’d come to do. Visit, probably read a few Bible verses.

No thank you.

He glanced at the trailer, a little surprised to see Josiah sitting on the steps, eyes closed, face tilted to the sunshine. No earbuds in, so no chance of Michael scaring him. Plus, he had to have heard the pastor drive up, so he wasn’t asleep. They did have another bright, sunny autumn day, so Michael stepped down off the porch and said, “Gorgeous weather.”

“Yes, it is.” Josiah blinked his eyes open. “I’m not fond of being outside when it’s cold or raining, but I love the sun.”

That didn’t surprise Michael one bit after his admission of having been homeless at some point. “I enjoy all the time I can get outdoors, which is probably why I’ve acclimated to the ranch so quickly. My old life didn’t allow for more than a few vacations here and there, or an evening on the balcony with a glass of wine.”

“Can you tell me more about your old life? All I’ve heard from whispered gossip is you worked with computers?”

“Software design.” Michael’s old life was still pretty raw, but Josiah had trusted him with some difficult secrets yesterday. He didn’t mind sharing a bit and getting to know his new friend. “I went to college for it and have an aptitude for numbers and coding. Software just makes sense to me. After I graduated, I got a good offer from a company in Silicon Valley, but I love Texas. I was born here and didn’t want to leave. So I joined a small start-up in Austin. Met a guy named Kenny Wilde there.”

He closed his eyes briefly, trying to block out the memory of Kenny’s handsome, smiling face on Michael’s first day. Michael opened his eyes and took a few steps closer, keeping a respectful distance between them. “Kenny and I hit it off, and we were working with two other guys at the time, but we all couldn’t agree on an app. And remember, this was twenty years ago, so smartphones were just really taking off, and everyone was saying ‘There’s an app for that.’

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