Page 125 of Just So You Know, I Don't Work Friday

“Shh,” I said, glaring at them. “Keep your voice down.”

“Harriet Campbell, I’m not going to keep my voice down,” Chelsea said. “I’m going to tell Mom and Dad.”

“If you do, I will literally kill you.” I bit down on my lower lip. “I’m going to go on the pill anyway.”

Polly sighed. “But it’s not just pregnancy you have to worry about. What about STDs?”

“Well, I guess I wasn’t thinking about that at the time,” I said. “I will ask him and make sure that he’s clean.”

“Well, if he’s not clean, then you’ve already got what he’s got,” Molly said, “and I sure hope he ain’t got nothing because then that would suck and I would have to stop drinking from the same glass as you. Sorry.”

“Girl, whatever.” I sighed. “But I know it was stupid. We just kind of got caught up in the moment.”

“Uh-huh,” Polly said, shaking her head. “I cannot believe you had sex with your boss in a haunted house.”

“Without a condom,” Chelsea added. “Holy sheesh. What have you done with my sister?”

“Guys, look, I know it’s not normal for me, but…”

“Everyone is acting so crazy these days,” Molly said, shaking her head.

“Who’s everyone?” I asked her, hoping to change the subject.

“Charlotte as well,” she said. “She’s just been acting cray, cray, cray, cray.”

“She’s always been crazy,” I said, rolling my eyes.

“Yeah, but she’s been acting really weird since you left.”

“I know she must miss me working there. I’m surprised she hasn’t called me to offer me my job back. Not that I would take it.”

“Yeah. I mean, I think she feels really guilty,” Molly said, “which is surprising because Charlotte never feels guilty.”

“Why do you think she feels guilty?”

“Well, I overheard her asking Delilah if you hated her.”

“What?” I frowned. “What do you mean?”

“She was really nervous that she’d been mean to you when she fired you and she felt like maybe you hated her and she didn’t want you to hate her because she thought you were a really great employee, and she said she just got caught up in something and really wanted to apologize, but she couldn’t apologize. I don’t really know what she was going on about. It was kind of crazy. And she keeps getting these phone calls in the middle of the day and,” Molly’s shrugged, “I don’t know. She’s just been acting weird. Everyone is going crazy. Is there something in the water? Are we being poisoned or something and I just don’t know?”

“I’m not acting crazy,” Polly said.

“Me either,” Chelsea said. “It’s just Harriet.”

I looked at them. “I’m not acting crazy. You two are just being bitches because you’re jealous that I’m getting some dick and you’re not.”

“I could totally get dick if I wanted to,” Chelsea said. “I could go over to any guy in this amusement park and be like, ‘Hey, you want to fuck me in the haunted house?’” Polly started laughing.

“Very funny,” I said.

“What? I bet you I’d get like eight out of ten guys wanting to do it, and the two guys that wouldn’t want to do it would either be gay or married.”

“Nah,” Molly said. “The married ones would do you as well.”

“Oh my gosh, guys, really?” I shook my head. “This is absolutely ridiculous. I’m never telling you guys anything again.”

“I don’t know that you were going to tell us,” Polly said. “You only got busted because Chelsea noticed that your skirt wasn’t on the right way.”

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