Page 81 of Payne's Envy

He always had, didn’t it? I never would have believed it before, but Payne, without his memories, had me convinced he had always cared about me.

I clasped my hands in front of me as I stood before him. “I’ll be waiting for you to tell me our past.”

Payne closed his eyes.

Chapter Thirty-Five

Payne

When I opened my eyes, I was in darkness. That bleakness was familiar, so I took a step forward.

That place… I lost myself in there, but it was also where I would find myself again.

Another step. One more, then I waited. I looked left and right. I waited again.

Breathing steady, my heart was calm despite wanting to go back to Joy before the next attack. A part of me wanted to run. It was what I was used to; I believed. I walked forward and found a younger me.

He clenched his hands at his side, and he breathed heavily as I approached. He wiped his eyes and then met mine. Suddenly, I remembered everything from my childhood. All the times Joy’s brothers beat the shit out of me. I got stronger because I’d go home, and my father would do the same.

“You’re gonna kill him!” Mom yelled at him one day.

“Nah. This is excellent character development,” Fear responded.

I snorted as all the memories bombarded me.

My younger self said, “Sebastian is mean. He makes me feel bad, like it’s wrong to want to protect Joy. I’d never harm her. I take care of her like her brothers do. Why am I resented for it?”

I dropped on one knee. “You were never wrong. They’re her brothers. It’s what they do. Look out for her.”

As much as I couldn’t stand them sometimes, especially back then, I understood. It didn’t mean I liked it. They were doing what big brothers did. They made sure no mean boys or girls were trying to harm their sisters.

“What about our parents?”

It wasn’t lost on me; he saidour.I was aware I was in my own head.

“What about them?”

“Mom says to hide it. What I feel for Joy.”

“Yeah. It made little sense to me either, but seeing you…” I shook my head. “Our feelings were too big to understand back then. Why our emotions for Joy seemed weird. Our parents weren’t our kind. They didn’t know what happened. Neither did we.”

“Do we understand now?” he whispered.

“Joy is our mate.”

He smiled the biggest smile before vanishing like wisps of smoke.

I was partially whole. I took a deep breath and walked forward to greet whatever version of me came next.

Chapter Thirty-Six

Joy

Besides the slight rise and fall of Payne’s chest, he was utterly still. I could look at him all day sitting on the boulder with his legs tucked underneath him. I would until he awakened.

He’d been in that state for at least an hour. The heat within made my pussy throb as I studied him. It took everything in me to stop myself from rubbing my legs together or masturbate. I thought he wouldn't mind if he caught me with my fingers between my legs, but it would mortify me.Payne had incredible restraint. If he could control himself, I could too.

The heat was the last thing on my mind when my scalp prickled. The warning ran down my back and arms. Then I smelled the dragon. The rotten stench of their flesh before I heard the first roar.

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