Page 168 of She will Always be Mine

An ugly pain stabs me in the ribs. Then numbness as time stands still.

My vision turns blurry as I read the words over and over again.

The video of Riaan and me on the terrace stares back at me like a horror flick.

My blackmailer posted it.

No warning. No demands. He’s finally pulled the trigger of his invisible gun.

I stare at the page where he shared it anonymously. It’s my college’s confession page. The caption reads “When you like to keep it in the family” with several hashtags attached to it.

My eyes dilate in horror as I scroll through the page. This can’t be happening. There are already hundreds of comments and likes. Each more degrading and derisive than the last.

Isn’t she from our college? I thought I saw her with this guy.

What a fucking slut.

Is she that desperate for dick that she took her cousin’s?

Are they really family? God! That’s disgusting.

They only become more debasing and humiliating as I read on.

“No! No! No,” I chant, panicked as tears sting my eyes. “Oh my God!”

The phone is ripped away from me as Riaan’s strong arms pull me against his hard chest. All of a sudden, several emotions attack me at once and I scramble from the bed at their intensity while pushing Riaan away.

The video doesn’t stop playing in my head. It’s as if it’s on a loop.

Fate is once again playing a sick joke on me hours after I was rejoicing in the fantasy that Riaan claimed me at the concert.Careful what you wish for… taunts my mind. Because in this moment, everyone is seeing me.

Did my blackmailer see us and decide to punish me tonight for being happy.

Strong palms cup my face and tilt my head back while wiping the tears away. Seeing the devastation and anguish on Riaan’s face breaks my heart, and I can’t help but lash out, “Don’t you dare say you’ll fix it. It’s too late. We lost.”

Hurt flashes behind those dark orbs of his, yet he doesn’t call me out on my misplaced anger. It cracks my heart even more with guilt and I fall apart.

“He—he r-released it, Riaan,” I stammer past the thickness in my throat.

“Baby… Please don’t cry,” Riaan whispers, eyes pained despite being hard and furious.“I’m so sorry.”

I thought I was prepared but I couldn’t be more wrong. The barrage of emotions I believed I had control over is nothing compared to the harsh slap of reality. The dark cloud that followed me like my own shadow finally bursts and chaos rains down on me.

The peace I had felt these past few weeks was the calm before the storm.

The wreckage.

The downfall.

Riaan says nothing and presses my head in the crook of his neck while I sob uncontrollably. The cruel taunts keep echoing in my head. I will myself to be strong but I fail.

My worst fear came true.

I promised Riaan I would fight and yet I’m shattering into pieces right before his eyes.

I could handle the taunts and the insults about my taboo relationship. But to have such an intimate moment between us out for the world to see is crushing and mortifying. It’s more disturbing than anything I’ve ever imagined.

It’s all my fault because I convinced myself I’d stop whoever was blackmailing me. Maybe it was his plan all along: To deceive me into believing I was safe and under the illusion of control, only to snatch it away when I least expect it.

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