Page 33 of My Three Roommates

Tanner won’t meet my eyes. “I don’t know. Is this how most people are going to react? I thought Eric would be the easiest person to tell. I certainly thought he’d be a lot more open-minded. If my own brother can’t accept me being with a guy, how’s anyone else ever going to accept the whole truth of our relationship?”

It’s a question I can’t answer. I do know I’m not giving any of these guys up.

“It won’t be easy with everyone,” I tell him. “It’s not a conventional relationship, that’s for sure. Other people might react like Eric. Maybe not quite that bad, but I guess it’s a lot to wrap your head around. How you would feel if it was reversed? If it was you who caught Eric with another guy, and then he told you he was involved in a foursome too. And it all came out of the blue, like it did for him? Even though obviously you’d be okay with it, finding out all of a sudden could be the reason for his reaction.”

“Could be,” Tanner says doubtfully.

“Maybe it was just the shock,” I repeat, trying to sound convincing. Neither one of us really believes that, but it’s still possible. It’s not something to dismiss. “Even if someone that we tell or who finds out about us, even if they don’t accept it right away, they might come around.”

“What if they don’t?” Tanner asks.

“Don’t what, accept us?”

He nods. “Yeah.”

“Then we’ll face it together. Because there’s no way I’m giving any of this up,” I tell him firmly.

“Are you sure?”

I catch his eye finally and he does look worried. “Of course. Just because I never thought I’d end up like this, doesn’t mean I don’t want to. Now that I know what having all of you guys means to me, I’m never going to let it go. You can count on that. Are you worried that I’m going to give up on us if it gets too tough?”

“I wouldn’t blame you. It would be easier,” Tanner admits. “You could go back to being with Brad only. I don’t know what I’d do without any of you. I’m not sure how well Cody and I would manage if it was just us two. Things just fit when it’s all of us together. I can’t even explain it, but I don’t want any of you to not be in my life like this. This is what I want.”

He crosses his legs, then uncrosses them. “That doesn’t change the fact that it would be a lot easier to just be part of a couple. So yeah, I’ve wondered if you might want out. Or Brad. I never thought that way before myself, but Eric’s reaction was so shocking, I have to say it crossed my mind tonight.”

“I know we can make this work, I have faith in all of us. Even though Eric’s being a jerk, he’ll get used to it. I don’t want to end anything, no matter how hard it gets.” I try to swallow past the lump in my throat. “If you want out for real, Tanner, tell me now. Because my heart couldn’t take it if you wait. It would be hard enough now, but even worse later.”

A faint smile crosses Tanner’s lips. “Yeah, I figured. You’re the strongest one of all of us. Ending it is the last thing I want to do. I just know it would be easier so if you ever change your mind, I’d understand.”

I shake my head. “No way. I’m all in. Always.”

“I am too.” He kisses my cheek and I trace lines around his firm chest. It’s nice, just the two of us. Tanner and I haven’t had much chance to be alone with each other yet. The better I get to know Tanner, the more I can’t imagine him not being one of my boyfriends.

“Hey.” I squeeze his hand. “What are we?”

“What do you mean?”

“Am I your girlfriend? Do you think of Brad and Cody as your boyfriends?”

Tanner considers for a moment. “I never thought about the labels. Tonight made me consider everything though.”

“And?” I ask. “What did you come up with?” I try to fight a sudden sense of foreboding. If Eric’s reaction made him doubt us, are we really as solid as I think we are?

“I think we’re better as four than on our own. To me, that’s what would make a girlfriend, and I guess a boyfriend too. Being better together than apart. I think that’s what we’ve got. I know that’s what I want us to be.”

“Me too,” I say. “Me too.”

“I want to make you happy, Kenna. In every possible way.” He pauses so long, I don’t think he’s going to continue. I’m about to speak up when his voice goes low again. “I think I feel the same way about Brad and Cody too. So yeah. Girlfriend. Boyfriends. It fits.”

“It does,” I say happily. “Perfectly.”

CHAPTER 19 KENNA

“NEVER WILL!” THERE’S nothing more satisfying than being able to shout out the lyrics to one of my favourite songs when I have the house all to myself. I swivel my hips in time to the beat as I as I slice into the vegetables.

Cooking is a passion of mine, and I don’t get the chance to do it nearly often enough. Tonight we’re all going to be home so I insisted we have dinner together instead of ordering in. We’ve been hitting all the delivery apps way too much since we moved in. There’s only so much take-out I can take.

Bouncing over to the stove, I stir the simmering tomato sauce and inhale deeply. The scent of garlic and basil is too much to resist. I sneak a quick taste. Yes. Nailed it.

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