Page 68 of Love Sick

“Everyone wants the good guy to win.”

“I am grateful for what you’ve done, I just wish you didn’t do all the other stuff in between.” How can she trust me not to tell anyone? I still don’t understand it.

“I don’t expect you to overlook everything I’ve done, but I thought you’d understand my actions because I would do anything for love. Just how I know you’d do anything for Luna. She may not see it, but you did what you thought was best for her.”

“I did that not knowing that everything I believed was based on a lie. Let us go, Alanna. We won’t tell anyone. Who would believe us, anyway? Two psychiatric escapee patients? Your reputation proceeds ours. Don’t you want this over with?”

She finishes bandaging my knee but keeps her hands wrapped around it, as if deep in thought.

Is she contemplating what I said?

“I know you’re not a bad person,” I say, ignoring the lies which spill from my mouth. “Yes, you’ve done some bad things, but you’ve also done good. Make this wrong a right and let us go.”

The air is heavy and I think Alanna is actually mulling over what I said. I need to keep going and say anything to twist her arm.

“What do you want?”

She finally peers up at me. “I want to be happy,” she whispers sadly. “My whole life, I just wanted to be loved. When Daddy found me, he promised to take care of me, and he did. He made sure I was fed and schooled. I owe everything to him.”

And what did he expect in return because he doesn’t seem like the charitable type?

“How old were you?”

“Five,” she replies with honesty, looking away. “I was dumped at Saint Agnes when I was a baby. Such a cliché. I was born into this world without love and it’s all I ever wanted.”

In most stories, there’s a villain, but we don’t usually get their backstories. They’re just the monsters we want to kill. But this explains Alanna’s skewed view on life and love. I don’t feel sorry for her. But I guess now, it helps me understand why she’s so fucked up.

Jonathan’s ammo was to prey on women he could manipulate for his own personal gain, but Alanna was something he didn’t bargain for. He got what he deserved. She did the world a favor. But killing Alanna, I still can’t help but feel like it’s such a waste.

I am so fucking torn over this entire thing. I want her dead. But in the next breath, I wonder if maybe she can be helped.

Maybe if she got help, real help and not that of a predator like Daddy, who should be helping his “daughter,” and not encouraging her, she could get better.

But after the things she’s done, I don’t think there is any getting better. And besides, Luna would never let that happen.

“This has to stop, Alanna,” I say, reaching down and placing a finger under her chin to coax her to look at me. “You know this is wrong.”

Her lower lip trembles.

When I see her humanity, it makes it hard to wish ill harm on her. I’m not that cruel. But every action has a consequence, and this is Alanna’s.

“Everything okay, Lana?”

The moment she hears Daddy, she quickly pulls away. “Yes, fine. Just changed Dutch’s bandage. I’ll take him to practice the piano once he’s dressed.”

She stands and brushes past Daddy, who stands in the doorway. He grabs her arm so hard that she flinches. “Where’s my kiss?”

She smiles, but it’s strained. She pecks his cheek and takes off down the hallway, but he doesn’t follow. He enters my room instead.

“I know what you’re doing,” he says, not bothering with pretenses. “It won’t work.”

“And what exactly am I doing?” I challenge with a smirk.

“Don’t insult me, Dutch. You’re an intelligent man, which is the reason why you’re still alive.”

“I beg to differ…the reason I’m still alive is because yourdaughterwanted to cut out my heart and give it to her very dead fiancé.”

Daddy doesn’t stir, meaning he knows all about Alanna’s plans.

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