Page 17 of Love Sick

He made me feel safe.

He made me feel loved.

But who is he?

I force myself to focus on this memory because it’s the key to solving all of this.

He’s tall. Slender, but muscled. He’s younger than me, but age doesn’t matter because when we kiss…

Splashes of color blind me and I wade through the confusion because I can taste him on my tongue. It’s the sweetest of flavors—I think I’m addicted because he’s my own personal brand of drug.

“Sleep, baby. I’m not going anywhere.”

“Promise?”

“With all my heart.”

His heart…why do I want to reach out and hold it in my hands?

Why do I feel like his heart is mine?

“I like the way your heart beats. Is that weird?”

“No, because it always seems to beat faster whenever you’re near.”

So much love is passed between this man and I, but then suddenly…the colors are replaced with black.

“It’s true? Your heart…his heart, it’s true, isn’t it?”

“I hate you.”

“You should. But you’re about to hate me even more.”

I’m blinded by rain and headlights.

“That’s right, you son of a bitch! Talk! Tell me what to do! You want me to save her? Tell me how!”

I am so frightened…not for me, however…I am frightened for him.

“No! Please d-don’t do this.”

“You want her to die? Then fucking fine! You want to be a chickenshit little pussy when she needs you the most? No wonder she fucking killed you!”

Who is he talking to?

His body seizes around mind, protecting me in his own way, which is an oxymoron considering he’s about to kill us both.

Who is this man he seeks the answers of? This man is important to us both. I feel nothing but love for both men…but one love is that of a mother. The other, a lover.

“Talk! If you ever loved her, tell me what you could never do. Tell me how to save her!”

The breath is knocked from me, and all I see is white.

I’m ripped from my mind and spiral back to the present where I feel my leg is wet from Noah’s cum. He dry humped me like the dog that he is.

I disassociated myself so easily from something so vile and was immersed in beauty, no matter how tragic it was because I remember him.

I rememberthem.

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