Page 69 of Heart Sick

I shower and dry off in record time. I don’t want to put my dirty clothes back on, but I also don’t want to sleep beside Luna naked. Reaching for the white robe off the back of the door, I put on the tiny garment and when I peer at my reflection in the mirror, I laugh.

I look ridiculous.

This isn’t how I imagined being in bed with Luna for the first time, and I’ve thought about it—a lot. I just wish it was under different circumstances. Switching off the light, the carpet mutes my footsteps as I make my way to the bed.

Luna is tucked tightly under the blankets, so I carefully pull back the blanket on my side of the bed and slip in. I turn onto my back and interlace my hands under my head, peering up at the water-stained ceiling. We need to grab clothes and other essentials if we’re going to hit the road in search of who the fuck my donor is.

Lost in thought, I don’t hear Luna shift until I feel her nestle into my side. “Is this okay?” she asks in the darkness.

“Yes.”

She wraps her arms around me but surprises me as she slips a hand into the front of my robe and gently runs her fingertips along the scar on my chest. Most would shy away from it, but not Luna. She never has. It’s like she finds peace in it somehow.

“I like the way your heart beats,” she whispers. “Is that weird?”

“No, because it always seems to beat faster whenever you’re near.”

Her body tenses at my confession, but I want her to know that whatever she’s experiencing, I feel it too. And I want more. Music has always been my obsession, but Luna is quickly becoming that now. I think that’s why whenever I’m with her, I can hear it again.

It’s moved over to make room for her, but there’s something missing. And until I can get to the bottom of it, I don’t think I’ll ever be able to play music again.

But for now, these moments with Luna are enough to silence the voices which I wish were filled with song.

It’s still dark out, but I feel most comfortable in the darkness. It’s in the darkness where my monsters live and play. And it’s in the darkness where we must survive until I can figure out what to do.

We need wheels, clothes, and money. And we need to acquire all of this undetected. I could call my parents, but when they find out what I did, it’ll just convince them that being in Parkfields is the place for me.

But I can’t stay there.

No good has come out of that place, and it’s only being outside those walls that things have become clearer. Facing my demons instead of convincing myself they’ll go away with time is the cure. Not being a medicated zombie. Which is why I need to steal us some clothes and a car.

Sleeping beside Luna felt natural, like everything else I’ve experienced with her. I want her like a man wants a woman, but I also feel the need to protect her in a way I can’t explain. I suppose I can’t explain any of this, though.

Focusing on what does make sense, however, I look out the window and zero in on a red Ford Maverick with its window wound halfway down.

Wheels—check.

Turning over my shoulder, I take a moment to admire Luna sleeping soundly. I hate to wake her, but we’ve got to split before sunrise. I quietly slip into my jeans and boots, but not the T-shirt, as it’s covered in blood.

Luna’s long light brown hair looks like an angel’s splayed against the pillows. She is so beautiful. His heart aches to touch her. Reaching out, I brush away a strand from her forehead.

“Luna?” I whisper into the darkness.

I wait for her to wake and when she stirs, she flinches, still in pain from her injuries. I mentally add more painkillers to the things we need.

It takes her a moment, but when she wakes, a loving smile spreads across her cheeks. “Misha.”

Misha?

I wonder why that name holds such importance to her because even suffering this lapse in memory, she seems to remember that name.

I shift so the sliver of light coming in from the streetlight outside the window illuminates my face. I can see the confusion pass over Luna’s face and worry overcomes me. Has she forgotten me again?

“Oh, sorry, Dutch. I don’t know why I said that.”

To say I’m relieved is an understatement.

“We gotta bounce,” I say, suddenly losing my train of thought as Luna’s attention dallies to my chest. She doesn’t hide her appraisal of my body and I like that she’s so forward.

---