Page 38 of Crybaby

I don’t know where I went,but I feel like I’m standing behindBlake,like an apparition just watching him destroy a girl on her firsttimeatprom.

I feel a rip, and it’s my body.

He’s entered me from behind, and I’m crying as he violates my back passage. Fingers, dick, something else—I don’t know what it is, but if I thought I was in pain before, I really had no idea how bad it could get.

“There’s a girl,” hepraiseshappily. “Whoa,nelly,take it easy.”

And I feel him break me in two.

I want to die. But he won’t kill me.

He pulls me back and forth over whatever he’s inserted into me like he’s riding a horse.

“I’m training you, my darling,” he says as he pushes in hard and keeps it there, waiting for me to relinquish tension.

My throat screams hard against the belt in my mouth, and I feel like I’ve gone crazy.

“Let it go, Darcie,” he says against my ear. “Just let go, baby girl. You got this.”

I can hear the other boys laughing in the distance like they are very far away now, and I’ve fallen down the darkest canyon.

Blake thrusts again, and my body lurches back and forth over the bleacher, my head collecting against what feels like a hard concrete wall. I want him to bash it harder so I can break my body on it for good.

There’s no coming back from this. I’ll never be the same again. The light of day will only burn me with realities I’ll never be able to face.

But still, there’s a small flicker of fire in me just dancing lightly over a version of me that knows nothing ever will or can break me. They just made the biggest mistake of their putrid lives.

Ihave the stamps and pistol. But it’s not enough.

I don’t know what it is about stealing that just gets me off. It’s in the dark and depraved where I thrive. I was born to do this, and no matter how much I have, I always want more. Which is why I decide to swipe the antique Persian dagger which sits prettily in Theodore the Third’s office.

With a name like that, he’s lucky I’m not taking a lot more.

Peering at the clock on his desk, I see I’ve been gone for a lot longer than I thought. Darcie is going to be fucking pissed. But I know she can look after herself.

Just five more minutes…

Just as I’m replacing the glass over the dagger case, I hear the front door open.

“Darling? I’m home early. Vinnie has food poisoning. I told him not to eat that clam chowder. Darling?”

Peering into the heavens and cursing silently, I know it’s time to bounce as Justine’s husband wasn’t supposed to be home for another hour. I shouldn’t have been greedy. I should have left earlier. If I had, I wouldn’t be stuck in this office with no escape, and Darcie wouldn’t be waiting for me to return.

Fuck.

But that’s the thing about hindsight—it’s fucking useless.

All I thought about was June, and how the more I steal, the sooner we can blow this town. Away from the ghosts that haunt us both every single day.

Creeping toward the window, I see that the drop into the garden below will probably hurt, thanks to the barberry bushes. But it’ll just add to the numerous cuts and scars I already have.

Ensuring I have everything I came here for, I quietly open the window but quickly retreat when I see a car pull up the drive. The headlights allow me to see Theodore hightailing it to whoever just pulled up. Fair to say, they weren’t invited.

A woman exits the car, clearly agitated. I can’t hear what she’s saying, but I can feel the sting of the slap she just delivered to Theodore’s cheek.

Whoever this woman is, however, she’s a godsend as it allows me to leave without needing to pick prickles out of my ass.

I quietly open the door and decide to exit the way I came—through the back door. However, I realize Justine is still gagged and tied to the bed.