“It’s smarter this way and you should be smart enough to see it,” Maurice said. “Never draw blood and the merchants won’t fear you enough to surrender. Draw it too often and they’ll put up a fight every time, rather than lose their lives.”
I could hear the self-satisfaction in Maurice’s voice as he concluded, “But never knowing, giving them a dose of hope and fear together, and they’ll bend to your will. Give a man that perfect mixture and you’ve got a man you can control.”
My heart pounded as, hidden in the shadows, I listened to them talk.
I had hope -- the hope to kill Colt and all his men to avenge my father. But other than the fear of failure, I had no fear.
Liar,said a voice in my head.You don’t want to die. Not any longer.
Scurrying below deck, I pondered that voice. Months had passed on the ship and I’d learned to work as a part of the crew, albeit, not as well. I was smart and quick, but never as strong as they desired or expected, and only I knew the reason why.
I was nearly down the stairs when I heard the captain.
“Stop,” he said. I turned to see him standing at the top of the stairs. “You think I didn’t know you were eavesdropping?”
My stomach twisted. Would he punish me? I must have paled because Colt laughed.
“If I whipped every man for listening in on conversations not his own, I’d have a shipful of bloody backs,” he said, as if reading my thoughts.
Colt stalked down the stairs and I froze, unsure what to say or do.
“You’ve been eating,” he remarked, looking me up and down.
I blinked. So?
“You’re settling in. Still want to kill me?” he asked.
“More than ever,” I swore.
“He drew first,” Colt said, for the hundredth time.
“He was protecting me!” I shouted, so angry I forgot to deepen my voice as I usually did. Luckily, Colt didn’t notice.
“That’s my job now,” he said, almost sneering at the declaration, as if he resented it. “I’ll do a better one than he did.”
“On a pirate ship?” I asked, disbelieving. “If you care so much for my well-being, dump me off at the nearest port and I’ll be on my way.”
Colt laughed. “You’d get yourself killed in a day. And if you didn’t, you’d just be waiting for the chance to kill me. Maybe you’d even succeed someday. Better to keep you here, keep you close.”
The pronunciation brought angry tears to my eyes. The idea that I might never escape Colt made my heart sink. Rather than allow him to see it, I turned on my heel to scurry away.
“There’s something else I’ve been doing in port,” Colt called after me. I stopped, curious at his tone. Almost… kind.
“I’ve been asking around the other crews,” he said. “We’ll find out who killed your mother, Charlie. It’s my… gift to you.”
At the mention of my mother, tears pooled in my eyes.
“You mean it’s your attempt at recompense for my father’s life,” I whispered. “And a pitiful one at that.”
“Call it what you like. I vow to find out who killed her.”
I shook my head and continued down the hall, even though I burned to know the truth about my mother.
I hated that Colt might be able to access this knowledge. Was it more hope? Was he instilling hope in me, in order to control me, as Maurice had said?
It didn’t matter. I had no way to escape the captain either way.
Chapter 35