Page 77 of Shake the Spirit

Never did I imagine I’d make this ride to prove my sexy new wife is an adult rather than a victim of child abduction.

Driving the SUV is Scrawny Mooney Deputy, who took the path of most men on that side of my bloodline. My pa did, too, despite his no-good father being an outlaw.

Pa-Donovan grew up as the black sheep of the Mooney family. He once said his life with them felt like a performance he was giving. Only when he met Journey could he be the real him.

I’ve never felt insecure. I grew up knowing who I was and where I belonged. That’s why I chill on the ride to the Clinton County Sheriff’s Department office. My only worry is Oana getting bullied by her family or the cops.

Frequent texts from my family keep me updated. Ma-Journey is going with Oana to the hospital to do a lady test to prove she isn’t a kid. I’m not thrilled my woman needs to jump through her family’s hoops. However, my ma and Edith will do whatever necessary to protect Oana.

After I arrive at the sheriff’s office, Jared parks his hog nearby. I walk inside with the deputies to where my paternal grandfather leans his shoulder against a wall.

“Hey, Sheriff OG Peepaw,” I say, giving him a head nod. “How come you haven’t retired?”

“You’d know that if you ever came to the Mooney family barbecues.”

“I don’t like corn on the cob or pigs.”

The sheriff doesn’t smile. Neither do I. We just stare at each other until Bearded Mooney Deputy gestures for me to enter the interrogation room.

King Peepaw pretends he’s my lawyer and joins me on one side of the table.

A new deputy arrives. His goatee is too thinly trimmed to be impressive.

“Oana Cotham is on her way to the hospital,” says Shitty Goatee Mooney Deputy.

“I wouldn’t know about that,” I lie like I was trained.

“We’ll know soon enough about her age and this entire situation.”

Shitty Goatee Mooney Deputy is joined by his goatee-free brother. The first guy remains standing while the other takes a seat.

“How did you meet Oana?” asks Goatee-Free Mooney Deputy.

“I can’t recall the specifics. I do remember she was really pretty.”

“And how long have you two been dating?”

“I’m not good with dates or the passing of time. I think I saw her at a restaurant in the last month. We got together after that.”

“We heard you were at the Holiday Inn in Rockwell for a few days.”

“I do remember staying somewhere. Maybe it was there. Could have been at the Hampton Inn.”

“No, it was the Holiday Inn. We talked to the manager.”

“Is that what he said?”

“Yes.”

“Okay, so, what does that have to do with me now?”

“We’re trying to put together a timeline for your relationship.”

“Why?”

“Her family is claiming she’s a minor. If the numbers are murky enough, this could fall on the right side of legal.”

“You said fourteen,” King Peepaw reminds them. “That’s not murky.”

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