Page 5 of Never Say Never

“Do you want to take a picture or just stand there staring at me like you want to shoot me with your taser?”

I blink at the tone in her voice, the snarl of fire, something that makes my nonexistent heart thrum against my ribs and my dick stand at attention in my pants.

If it wasn’t her, a woman I need to stay far away from, I’d tease her into treating me with the same sweetness I see her use with everyone else in her life. Instead, I should be biting her head off and walking away, keeping as much distance between us as possible

But we’re going to have to spend time together tonight, and I can try and be nice at the very least.

I could tell her I need her help even though I’m pretty sure she’ll blow away in the wind outside.

“Are you just going to sit on your ass all night and mope and play stupid games on your phone? Or are you going to come help me clear some roads?”

She recoils, dark pink staining her cheeks, and her bottom lip wobbles. Not a lot, most wouldn’t notice, but I notice everything about Brandi, whether I want to or not. And damn, I feel like the dick I pretend to be most of the time I’m around her.

I’d love to just write my actions off and use the excuse that I haven’t had a relationship since my wife left, but I’ve been with women, slept with plenty, and I don’t have a problem with any other female I’ve seen since the divorce. Brandi, though? Yeah, we’ve got a big problem.

One that can’t be fixed. And I know why.

It’s everything about her, from the way she blinks and blushes at the slightest attention. It’s the half smile she gives to every single child she sees. It’s the way she doesn’t even have to try to be the center of attention, yet she is. It’s how she pulls me to her when it’s the last thing I want. Attraction isn’t all it’s cracked up to be in the best of times.

And these aren’t the best of times.

I’ve even been thinking of leaving Birch, just to get a fresh start away from my feelings.

“Ah, forget it.” I turn to go, but stop short when I hear a tiny little sound, half protest, half cry. The sound of something breaking that slips from her.

I turn back and that empty spot in my chest twists. Brandi’s blonde head hangs down and she stares at her phone, her face obscured by her hair. But I know she’s not really looking at her phone. Her shoulders rise and fall in staccato waves, and I hear the nearly silent sobs that leave her lips.

Fuck.

I can’t just walk away from her.

Not when it’s beyond clear that she needs someone… something.

I should run away.

Embrace the coward inside me.

I should do just that and pull someone else from whatever work they’re doing and get their help instead.

Brandi’s dangerous to me.

Beyond that.

She’s worse than kryptonite, and so far I’ve done a bang-up job of keeping her at a distance.

But this stupid fuckin’ storm. It’s dragging her into my circle, and there’s not going to be any getting away from her.

It’s getting complicated.

I don’t want anything to do with complicated. Not to mention the obvious problems I have with Brandi, complicated will be the only thing that comes from starting a relationship of any kind with a dispatcher. It won’t end well for me, or for her. Dispatchers who date get a bad reputation in the department. So I keep away from that pool in general and I need to stay away from her in particular.

Not that I’m even thinking about dating Brandi, and she’d laugh if she even knew I stroke my dick almost every night to the smile I picture on her face when she’s on her knees in my fantasies.

Against my will or not, attraction is attraction.

But to walk away from her when she clearly needs help. When there’s something in her eyes that I have the power to change. When I can see that I can beat back the monsters in her mind?

I don’t have a choice.