Page 79 of Never Give Up

“Not yet.” Brandi leads the way to the front door but waits for me to unlock it and reset the alarm.

Poppy’s the last one inside before I lock the door and restart the alarm. “Yeah, right. That man could hook one finger in your direction and you’d have an orgasm on the spot.”

The others fall over themselves laughing and I flush as a familiar heat courses through me at the memory of Brian making me come with his fingers.

We chat and laugh and slowly, as we all lie down on the living room floor, we drift off to sleep. Well, Poppy and Brandi do. Lilly and I are still up, munching on popcorn and watching the latest superhero movie.

“Can I tell you a secret?” Lilly says when the mid-credit scene rolls. She flops onto her side, looking at me, while she curls into a blanket.

“Yeah, of course.” I haven’t spent a lot of time with Lilly, but she seems like an amazing girl, or young woman. Whatever age she is.

“I hate it when people call me Lilly. It’s my middle name. My first name is Margot, but no one ever calls me by it. Stupid thing started with one of the guys who used to work with my dad.”

She smiles shyly, and right then, I decide I will do whatever I can to help her feel comfortable and confident with who she is. Plus, I absolutely adore her.

“Okay, then. Margot. But something tells me that’s not what you really wanted to talk about.” I look at the younger woman, and a telltale blush spreads over her cheeks.

Sighing, the younger woman says, “I think I might be involved in something that’s a little over my head.”

“What’s going on?” I ask softly.

“I’m seeing someone I shouldn’t, or I guess it’s a bad idea that I am.” Lilly, or rather Margot, looks as though her entire world is coming to an end.

“Is he married or in a relationship at all?” I ask, getting drawn into the drama.

“No, he’s just not anything like me,” Lilly whispers. “And I don’t think I’m what he’s looking for. It just sort of started as sex, or that’s what I thought. But now, I don’t know. And I’m not sure if I’m ready for that. I’m just so young still. I only turned twenty-one this year. And he’s… older.”

I want to dive in and ask questions but I hold myself back. Maybe someone in law enforcement, but it’s up to Lilly—Margot—to tell me, and maybe she isn’t ready to tell me everything.

“If you’re not sure, then take your time. Love is…complicated. And sex can be, too. And listen, I’m here if you ever want to talk to me about anything.”

Margot nods, the color darkening in her cheeks. “I just wish I knew what to do. If I should push forward because I’ve known him forever and I have feelings, you know? Or do I end it because I’m not ready for forever and I think that’s what he’s looking for. What should I do?”

“Honestly?”

Nodding, Margot says, “Yeah, of course I want you to be honest with me.”

“Tell him how you feel,” I insist. “You need to be up front. Don’t lead him on or walk away without an explanation. It’s just going to confuse and hurt him.”

“I don’t want to hurt him. That’s the thing.” She pauses and takes a few moments, I assume, to collect her thoughts. “I love him, I’minlove with him. But I don’t know if I’m ready to have kids or settle down. I haven’t even lived yet. And there’s so much that I want to do. I’ve loved him my entire life. I just want to be able to build something for myself before I… settle isn’t the right word. He’s already had an entire life that doesn’t have anything to do with me.”

“You don’t need to have kids with him or promise him forever right now,” I say. “I’m saying just be honest with him. He’ll do the same with you. Most guys just want to know what the hell we’re thinking, without needing a cheat book to figure it out.”

“Okay, I will.”

I take a breath. “And one more thing.” My mind drifts to Brian and the conversation we had before my attack. “He might not want more. So be prepared for that, too.”

“Thanks, Maya.” Margot curls into her blanket and looks at her with gratitude shining in her eyes.

“No problem.” I mean it. Margot seems like a sweet girl. Honestly, she’d be perfect for someone like Jake.

But I’m not a matchmaker, not when I can’t sort out my own life.

Margot sighs and then says, “Good night.”

Smiling to myself, I say, “You too.” I roll over into my blanket a little further and close my eyes.

No one else is up when I crawl out of my blanket cocoon a few hours later.

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