Page 2 of Never Give Up

Brian drops his hand and steps back, sealing the coffin on my hopes of a future between us.

“Why?”

“The boys are all I have left. All I can give my attention to.” He steps toward the door separating the kitchen from the rest of the Birch County Sheriff’s Department. “They’re my life.”

With that, the man of my dreams turns and walks away, taking my broken heart with him.

If I’d kept my mouth shut, the streaks of hot pain wouldn’t be slashing through me and making my heart ache all over again.

If I’d kept my mouth shut, he’d never have said those things. Never said we couldn’t go back.

If I’d just kept my mouth shut, I would be a coward.

I lost him. In all the ways that matter.

Just because I want him.

And I had to be stupid enough to tell him.

The tears burning my eyes, blurring my vision, and clogging my throat begin to fall moments after the patrol room door closes.

No.

I’m not about to sob and break because of a man.

Taking a deep and jagged breath to steady the emotions swirling through my body, I wipe my face and stand on suddenly shaky feet.

What the hell is wrong with me?

As the tears dry and I regain control of my emotions, I shake my head.

“Men suck.” My words echo through the empty room.

Poppy looks at me above the computer screens when I make my way back to the dispatch room, her curly red hair unkempt like always. “You told him, didn’t you?”

I nod and take my seat at my side of the computer station.

“You know he’s still in the building, right?” Poppy’s concern permeates the air. “I warned you. He’s a hot mess and you deserve better.”

Before I can speak, the patrol room door slams open, echoing as it hits the wall behind us, and the booming voice of the lieutenant on duty hits us as he storms in.

“What do you mean, you can’t find him?” He practically roars. “He’s driving a bright-yellow car! It can’t be that hard to find a drunk man driving that monstrosity.” The lieutenant’s face starts to turn red like a three-year-old having a temper tantrum, and there is only one deputy in the office for him to take it out on.

“Bill, he’s driving a cab. Of course he’s going to be able to get away. It’s the middle of tourist season and the roads are packed,” Brian says, following him through the office toward dispatch.

I know that placating tone. The one he’s used on suspects and calming his lieutenant’s bad attitude. The same one he used on me in the kitchen only a few minutes before.

It’s the same voice I dream about at night, being used in a completely different way.

Not that it matters.

Not anymore.

“Just tell dispatch to get Serenity Harbor PD on it.” With that, Bill slams his office door on the other side of the wall connecting dispatch to the rest of the sheriff’s department.

A few seconds of blissful quiet follow that, but I’m not calm. In fact, my heart starts to race because I know what’s coming. And I am abso-fucking-lutely not ready to see his face. The sound of footsteps grow even when I’m screaming in my head for him to leave. I don’t turn; I don’t do anything. I just stare at my blank computer screen and listen to him breathe right behind me for what feels like an eternity.

“Hey.” He finally breaks the awkward silence and clears his throat. “Did you call—”