Page 11 of Dirty Padraig: Dirty Dusters

And I have all the time in the world to give her.

CHAPTERFOUR

JAINE

JFK Airport, New York

I knowthe minute I step out of the aircraft that I’m in serious trouble.

Two SUVs are waiting on the tarmac, so one of us isn’t going straight to Chez O’Connell. It’s my guess the unlucky person who pulled the short straw is me.

I stare up at the rain-laden sky, suddenly apprehensive. I haven’t spoken to Eoin since he disconnected the call yesterday, even though I tried several times to make contact. He was beyond pissed. He likely didn’t want to say anything he’d regret. He’ll also want to make sure that what he does have to say is said face to face.

Privately. With no witnesses.

Duke looks concerned on my behalf but says nothing. I nod at him reassuringly, then make brief eye contact with Dec. His deadpan expression gives nothing away as he silently loads my luggage while I get into the back of the vehicle.

I’m probably heading straight to the docks. I don’t know that for sure, and I’m not going to waste my breath by asking. Dec won’t tell me. He reports to Eoin, not to me, and I’m pretty sure my next destination will have been hand-chosen by my ex-husband.

I’ll just have to let Dec take me on a mystery tour. I pull my phone from my pocket as soon as we’ve set off.

Jaine:Should I be worried?

Dylan:I can’t believe you didn’t tell him where you were going, Jaine.

Jaine:I had my reasons. What’s his mood like?

Dylan:Ma says he’s not been home since he spoke to you yesterday.

Jaine:Is that common?

Dylan:Only when he’s so wound up, he’s not safe to be around other people.

Jaine:Jesus Christ.

Dylan:Praying might not be such a bad idea.

Jaine:I can look after myself.

Dylan:I know that, but he doesn’t. You need to tell him.

Jaine:I will.

Dylan:He has a right to know. You’re meant to be in a committed relationship.

Jaine:I am committed.

Dylan:Then act like it. No lies. No deceit. In this life, it’s the only way. You know that. Don’t underestimate how much he loves you. He’s never had to deal with these sorts of emotions before. This is all new to him. He’s struggling, Jaine. You’re his kryptonite.

Jaine:Should I change my name to Lois?

Dylan:It’s not funny. Ask yourself this. How would you have felt if he had disappeared without a trace and without bothering to tell you?

I shouldn’t have made a joke of it. It was wrong of me. Dylan has a point, I’m well aware of that, but I do have my reasons, and they are valid.

I’m concerned that the Mr. Smug. Selfish. Pompous side of Eoin O’Connell will view me as some sort of prize trophy once I tell him, and that, even though he won’t be able to share my secret with anyone, he’ll put me under even more pressure to get married for a second time. And I’m in no rush to retake the vows, not after everything that’s already gone wrong between us.

The past may be water under the bridge, but a calm surface can easily betray the raging currents still lurking below.

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