Page 5 of Dirty Eoin

I guess it’s for the best because it’s all too late. Even if the odds weren’t stacked against us by my own flesh and blood. Even if she wasn’t happily married to her childhood sweetheart. Even if by some small miracle she loved me back.

It’s all over. The fat lady has sung.

Last night, I crossed the line. And now I have no choice but to take the vows with Sophia.

I swallow down the sinking feeling rising from my gut. The silent sound of each rusty nail being hammered into the coffin they will bury me alive in echoes through my head.

I stare. She stares.

Right now, for me, nothing else matters. No one else matters. If this is all I will ever have, then I will drink in my very last fill of Jaine Jones.

I want this moment to last forever.

I know this is closure. More so for me. Even if she did care, I’d have to pretend not to. I’d have to let her go.

Once and for all.

Sophia is on the phone. Eoin is on the phone.

Leoluca Di Matteo appears alongside Jaine. He whispers in her ear then places a gentle hand on her shoulder, motioning his head towards her bag. Her phone’s been ringing, but she’s been so caught up in the moment she hasn’t heard it.

When she breaks eye contact, that’s when it sinks in. The realization that this is it. That this is the point of no return. There’s no coming back from this. Time is running out and there’s nothing I can do to stop it. Is this what dying feels like?

For two years, I’ve waited in the same spot. Tossed aside. Discarded. Abandoned. Where I’ve wished. Where I’ve hoped. Where I’ve dreamed.

In the end, it was all for nothing.

Wishful thinking. Foolish hopes. Pipe dreams.

As here I will remain.

Alone. Unneeded. Unloved.

I want to speak. I want to tell her I need her. That I love her. That she’s my reason for being. My reason for breathing in and my reason for breathing out, even if I’m not hers.

Instead, I say nothing.

Resignation. Hopelessness. Acceptance.

She takes the call. Her face pales. And then my life is over.

She’s gone.

CHAPTERTHREE

ACE

The Ghost Whisperers’ Clubhouse, Colton, Nevada

Sitting outside the clubhouse,I stretch my legs in front of me and stare across the Nevada desert. There’s nothing to see for miles. Raising my face to the sun, I close my eyes and inhale air that is way too warm and smells of nothing in particular. Not like the sweet smell of my hometown. I’ll be heading off at sunrise. Back home.

Now the Whisperers are part of the alliance, there’s no need for me to stick around or to even come back. Well, at least not so often. My work here is done for now.

For me, that means things can get back to normal. I can go back to living my life in Rising. With PJ and my boys.

Well, whatever normal is for the prez of an MC.

I’m wearing a smile of contentment, but I figure I’ve earned that shit. These days, my life is as close to perfect as it's ever going to be, but that hasn’t always been the case.

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