Page 22 of Dirty Dylan: Dirty Dusters

Padraig:Naming any names?

Jaine:Nope.

Padraig:So, what if the deceit was long-term? If the person had been lying for quite some time.

Jaine:I guess whether I’d want to end their life would depend on who it was and what the betrayal was over. On how big of a deal it was. It’s not a one cap fits all answer, Dyl. Would I be able to forgive them? Trust them again after lying to me long-term? Nope.

Padraig:Right.

There’sa pause and it has me wondering where the fuck this is going.

Padraig:And are you guilty of it?

Jaine:Of what?

Padraig:Lying.

Yes. Yes. Yes.

I’m as guilty as sin. My mind immediately drifts to my little boy and the secret that will one day unfurl. The clock is counting down to the revelation of the biggest secret the O’Connells will ever have witnessed. The existence of a beautiful child with hair as black as coal and eyes of sparkling blue. The little boy that, with each passing day, looks more and more like his Irish daddy. Fin’s parentage is undeniable. He has the same cocky nature and the same matching smirk. If he has any of my traits, I don’t see them. All I see is my Irish shining out of him. His son is him in miniature form.

But then, is that all I’m choosing to see? Because with each passing day, I miss him more and more. They say time heals.

Bullshit.

All it does is fill you with regret and make you forget things you never wanted to let go of. I don’t want to forget. I’m trying to preserve the memories, but more and more drip away each day like they’re being held in a bucket with a hole in the bottom. And there’s nothing to replenish them with. So soon it will be empty. Nothing left of a relationship that spanned nine years of my life. Both anger and guilt flow through me, and the tears that go hand in hand these days prick my eyes.

Yes, the clock is ticking rapidly now. I’m almost four months gone. Not much longer.

Jaine:Yes.

Padraig:Is the lie you’re telling forgivable?

Jaine:No, Dylan. It’s not. So, I can only hope the person, when they eventually do find out, will understand my reasons for doing so.

Padraig:Same.

* * *

With an eye rollI answer my phone to him.

“Thank you, Jaine.”

“For?

“Keeping the situation contained as much as you have done. I had no idea the IRS could be so quite so forensic.”

“They’re only doing their job, Eoin. Same as I’m only doing mine.”

“You’ve been magnificent.”

I laugh dryly. “I wouldn’t go that far. But then I guess not all of us spend all day sitting around our ivory tower.”

“Meaning?”

“Meaning I built my company from the ground up with my own two hands. I earned my success the hard way. You simply inherited yours.”

“None of us get to choose the lives we’re born into, Jaine.”

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