Page 95 of The Darkest King

“Tell me.”

I sigh again.

“I used to plan my wedding when I was little. My mom would play along, and we’d imagine what my dress would look like, and she’d show me how she’d do my hair.”

Connor runs his fingers up my arm, his gaze roaming my face. I wonder why he cares. Orifhe cares. I continue because I want him to know. Fake or not, he’s going to be my husband, and we’re sharing our lives under this roof.

For now.

If I married a mobster in an arranged marriage, it could be way worse. There’d be no love. At least I’m attracted to Connor.

Highly attracted.

I know he desires me because ninety percent of the time we’re together, he’s touching me. Not just sexually. Every night, we have sex, but there’s a difference between a man wanting sex and one who wantsyou. It’s in the way they look at you, the time they take while touching you.

This man confuses me so much.

This relationship confuses me, and yet, I know I’m safe with him.

Watching him with my father was terrifying but thrilling. I’ve never seen anyone meet Joe Mancini on the same level before. Now that I can breathe again, I can admit it was one of the sexiest things I’ve ever seen.

I mean, Connor is gorgeous, but seeing him stand up to my father was goddamn panty-destroying.

Then he went ahead and spoiled it by deciding we are getting married next month. That was annoying, but when he brought up the venue, my heart splintered.

Fake wedding or not, I want my mom.

My whole family knows I want to marry in Long Island. I spent half my childhood dressed up as a bride, zooming around the house with curtains on my head.

If I don’t, it will be very odd, but how can I?

How can I marry this man, who doesn’t love me, in the one place where my mother raised me while wishing she was with me?

Does my freedom mean that much to me?

Can I dishonor her?

“I used to dress up and pretend to walk down the aisle with a bunch of flowers,” I tell Connor. “I’d steal from the front entrance bouquet. Susanna would get angry and curse in Italian, throwing her arms in the air, until momma would tell her it doesn’t matter.”

Connor smiles as I laugh, then a little unexpected sob escapes me. He curses and pulls me into his arms.

“Fuck, Mia. I’m an idiot.”

“You didn’t know,” I say into his chest.

“I should’ve fucking known.” He takes my chin and forces me to look at him as a tear slips out. His eyes shut for a moment, and then his thumb wipes the tear away. “You deserve so much goddamn more than all of this. It’s not right.”

All I can do is blink and stare at him.

His expression is pained, and it surprises me. I can’t tell if he regrets this or cares about me.

Perhaps that’s it.

Getting involved with my family is a risk to his organization’s reputation. Was tonight a reality check?

Why did he agree to all this?

For me? For sex? For a measly one point five million dollars?

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