Page 5 of Forever Mine

She’s quiet for just a second and then continues, “So then I’ll see you at class tonight?”

Darn it. “Uh, actually, I took the whole day off. I have a sub for my night class too.”

Jilly is so quiet, I almost wonder if she’s hung up. “Jilly… you there?”

“What are you not telling me?”

I sigh as I peek out the back window. When I went into the garage earlier, I saw that Beau’s SUV was still in the garage, which means he’s still in the pool house. It’s not like him to miss work. Probably in the last two years, I can count maybe three times he has. Two of them were when he got drunk with his brothers a few nights ago, and he had to recover for both those days. The third is today.

“Natalie Blaze… answer me.”

I grip the phone tighter. “I told him… I told Beau I wanted a divorce.”

I hear Jilly gasp in the phone, and almost immediately, her voice softens. “Oh, Nat, honey. I’m so sorry. What did he say?”

I pace back to the kitchen and pour a glass of tea. “What do you think he said? He sure didn’t beg me to change my mind or even attempt to talk me out of it. I believe his first question was to ask me what I want from him.”

Jilly blows out a breath. “I just don’t get it. I’ve seen him with you and yeah, he’s not all touchy-feely, but he loves you, Nat. The way he looks at you and does little things for you. There’s no convincing me otherwise.”

I lean against the wall and look out the window that overlooks the pool area and backyard. I’m a fool because I’ve spent most of the day right here, looking outside hoping to just get a glimpse of Beau. “Jilly, he wasn’t even surprised when I told him I wanted a divorce. I swear it’s like he’s been waiting for me to do it or something. Heck, he’s probably glad to get rid of me.”

“Stop, Nat. Did he say anything? Did he ask you why?”

I snort and bark out a laugh. “Yeah, he asked me if there was someone else. What a joke, right?”

When she doesn’t laugh with me, there’s a twinge of guilt I feel, and it gets worse when she asks, “Did you tell him about Mark?”

I choke on the tea I just took a drink of and sputter, “What about him? Why the hell would I tell Beau about Mark? I’m not interested in him at all. He has nothing to do with this.”

It’s as if I can hear her rolling her eyes. “Nat, stop. I know you haven’t cheated on Beau, but I still think that Mark is worth mentioning.”

“I don’t. Plus, it doesn’t even matter. Beau doesn’t care. He’s more worried about who gets the cars and the money than what’s happening between us.”

She sighs into the phone, and I know she doesn’t completely understand why I’m doing what I’m doing. Since I met Jilly, she’s been a fan of Beau’s, and she’s always tried to be my voice of reason. But right now, I don’t need a voice of reason. I need my friend.

“Jilly, listen to what I’m saying. It’s done. I’ve told him I want a divorce, and he didn’t even try to talk me out of it. If anything, I think he’s relieved. I get to keep my car and the gym. He moved into the pool house, and I need to find a place to live because as soon as the divorce is final, I’ll be moving out.”

“Fine, you’re right, fine. I’ll start collecting boxes. I’ll keep my ears peeled for anything about apartments opening up. And we’ll do a girls’ night. You want to go tonight?”

I should go because the thought of sitting here all night by myself is a little overwhelming, but I don’t want to go out. I don’t want to act like my life isn’t falling apart, and I know my friends wouldn’t expect me to, but I would feel like I should. “No, I think I’ll stay in.”

“Well, that’s okay. The girls and I can come there. I’ll bring pizza and ice cream… or do you feel more like having wine…. Ooh, or is it a tequila night?”

I take another sip of tea. “I’m sorry, Jilly. But tonight, I just want to be alone. I’m going to take a hot bath, maybe read a little bit and go to sleep. I’m giving myself tonight, and then tomorrow, I’ll get back to it all.”

“Are you sure, Nat? I hate to leave you…”

“I promise, I’m fine. I’ll call you if I need anything. You know I will.”

She sighs loudly into the phone. “Okay, I’ll see you tomorrow in class, and if you’re not there, I’m coming over.”

I can’t hold back my laugh. “I know you will. I love you, Jilly. Thanks for everything.”

“Love you, Nat. I’ll see you in the morning.”

I hang up the phone and close the blind that leads to the backyard. I can’t just sit here all day looking for a sight of my soon-to-be ex-husband.

I take my teacup to the kitchen and am washing it out when the doorbell rings. I freeze for just a second, trying to figure out who it could be. I know I’m being ridiculous. I set the cup down and make my way to the front door. Looking through the peephole, I see that it’s Huddy, one of Beau’s brothers.

---