Page 18 of Running on Empty

“You can go to fucking hell.” My arms fell limply to my side. “All of you. You knew. You always knew.”

“I told you we should tell her,” Ronan said with a shake of his head.

“She wasn’t ready,” Ash insisted, and the hard expression on his face made me just want to slap it right off. “She still isn’t.”

“Sheis telling you to get the fuck off her property before she calls the cops,” I shot back. “You have until I count to five. One, two.” I raised my hand and counted off fingers like I was a primary school teacher or something.

“There are other things at play right now, more than just our relationship,” Ash said, stepping forward and into my space like he had a right to. “Everything we’ve learned about the dickheads drugging omegas with Rush is that they come back for more. You’re a rare commodity—”

“Oh,pleasetalk about me like I’m a thing,” I said, jabbing my finger into his chest, “back at your place. An omega chooses to claim her mates, right?” The three of them shifted warily. “Well, I don’t choose you. Fuck off.”

“Stevie—”

I turned on my heel, walking away from all three of them, unlocking my front door and then slamming it shut, throwing the lock in place. I could still see their shadowy shapes through the privacy glass.

They didn’t have a key, I assumed, or if they did, they didn’t use it. I watched as they had a muffled conversation, and my tension only abated to relief when they walked away.

And at the same time, I was devastated that they did.

I couldn’t have them near me. The thought of it made me fucking sick. And yet? Part of me wanted them to go fucking nuts and be the Big Bad Wolves that blew my house down to get to me.

Because if they did, I’d know they actually wanted me.

But they didn’t. So I paced around the house, going through the lockup procedure they’d all made me learn by heart, until the house was secure and me with it. Only then did I walk into my room. I threw myself down onto my bed, scrambling to get under the pillows, under the covers, pulling them tight to form a cocoon around me that shut the whole world out before I could let out the breath I was holding.

The guys had tried to tell me I’d been sexually assaulted today but, fuck, the Spencer pack had made more of an effort to ask for my input than the Kelly pack had. My breath came in rough and ragged, everything, all of what had happened smashing into me, over and over. But right before I got to the point of tears, I stopped myself.

I didn’t have to go along with anything thatanyof these dickheads had in mind. I’d looked after myself fine for years. And tomorrow, I’d get up and go to work and do so again. Fuck the Kellys, fuck the alphas, and fuck this shit.

Not exactly a peaceful mantra, but I said it over and over until my brain accepted the message and then, finally, the exhaustion that had been plaguing me all day rose and dragged me down, down, down.

Chapter12

I’d thought I would wake up early, have time to do some of the shit I should’ve done on my day off. But, nope, I slept all the way through until 2 pm and even then it took my alarm to rouse me. At first, I just yawned and blinked as I hit the phone to silence it, my mind blessedly calm. I just lay there watching the way the shadows played across my ceiling, feeling the soft plush of my blankets.

Until I remembered.

Gripping the phone so hard it was lucky the screen didn’t break, I pulled myself out of bed with unnecessary violence, then stomped down the hall to the bathroom, wishing I could stomp on some parts of those Kelly boys as I did so. Pulling the shower screen open, I set the water temperature and stepped in, cursing them as I did so.

And then as I lifted my hand to grab the soap and my washcloth, I saw the bruise around my wrist, now gone a sickly yellowish green.

I forgot all about the pack next door then as those voices reverberated in my mind again.

“Fuck yeah, this pussy is tight! That’s it, omega, clench around me.”

“Take my fucking knot, bitch.”

“You love it, don’t you, sweetheart? You love my cock.”

The voices were disembodied, echoing in my ears without the accompanying events running in front of my eyes. As I stood, frozen, my guts roiled, full of acid from no food and too much coffee the day before. I jolted back to reality and my fingers became claws, making a high-pitched screech as I raked them along the tiles. What had happened, the way it felt, exactly what they’d done to me, hit me hard, making my stomach churn even more, as though it was all going to come spewing up along with the bile burning in my stomach.

But I didn’t let it. I clawed the tiles and clenched my teeth and shut that shit down.

How else had I got through school if not by doing just that? Some kids couldn’t pull back. They’d go absolutely feral in the classroom, but I’d seen what happened to them. Detentions, parent-teacher meetings, suspensions. I’d needed some adults in my corner, because there sure as hell hadn’t been any at home, so at school I made sure I was quiet and well-behaved. Withdrawn really, but still, it had the desired effect. So I was well used to stuffing down memories, feelings, and I called on that old skill until finally there was nothing else in the shower with me. I washed myself in record time after that, the various aches and pains in my body making themselves known at each pass of the washcloth, but I ignored them, too. Then I got out and looked in the mirror.

My makeup was mostly washed away, just a faint circle of black around each eye, making them look smokier than they should have, as though I’d been aiming for that ‘heroin chic’ look. But my eyes were wide open and staring.

Bruises didn’t tend to freak me out like they did most people. I’d worn enough of them and had dealt with the resulting stares and intense questions from the school counsellor over the years. But still, part of me didn’t like seeing them again. There were none on my face or around my neck, thankfully. But around my arms, my wrists, pressed into my hips, dotted across my inner thighs, even around my ankles, as I looked down at my body, I saw that those fuckers had left their marks all over me.