Page 105 of Running on Empty

Ronan might be the stabby one, but it turned out when I was backed up against the wall, I was pretty damn cutting too. But all my violent fantasies died the moment Ash lunged at me, grabbing me when I went to wrench away, hauling me up into his arms even as I raked my claws through the air, then forced my legs around his waist as he slammed my back into the stable wall. Horses snorted and people whispered frantically, but right now there was only one other person in the world and that was Ash.

“Those pricks at the club, they were just blokes in a long line of men who’ve hurt you, disappointed you, failed to provide you with everything you need and deserve.” Ash said the words like he was biting off each one. “But right back at the start is us…” He blinked, his eyes blue now. “Me. You reached for us at the start because you had no one else.” I squirmed then in earnest, needing to get away from this speech, but he held fast. “Then when you were a bit older, you thought we’d be the men of your dreams, the ones to be the exact opposite of those fucks your mum brought home.”

His jaw muscle flexed then, his gaze daring to dart away from mine, right up until I grabbed his jaw, turning him back to me.

“But you weren’t,” I said. I’d sliced and diced Jack Spencer and his brothers, but no cut felt deeper than this. “You weren’t, Ash. You didn’t step up, hiding behind your mother, your family, some fucking sense of honour—”

“I know.” He stared into my eyes, all masks gone in this moment, all of the pain in the world in his eyes. “Sometimes you know you’re fucking up, over and over, but all you can do is compound that shit because it’s too hard to be anything else. To fucking… dare to step out of your own way. I did it, Stevie, every fucking thing. I hurt you far worse than those dickheads because they didn’t have two brain cells to rub together and I had far more than that.”

I felt his breath rather than heard it, the ragged inhale and the tortured exhale. It went in and out, clawing its way through his lungs, until he stilled.

“I knew. I knew what you needed, what you fucking deserved. I’m your alpha, your fated fucking mate, so I can’t even claim ignorance. Part of me deep down knew exactly what I had to do to be your man and I… failed. I failed you, my brothers, everyone and…” His eyes narrowed as if he was preparing himself for a hit that never landed. “And none of this would have happened if it hadn’t been for my bullshit.”

My heart skipped a fucking beat, the feeling a terrible lurch as he pressed his forehead to mine, darting closer, but not close enough.

“Make me shovel the shit, not you, Stevie. Not you. You’ve been carrying this bullshit for far too long and I can’t let you do that anymore. Give it all to me, all of it, because I’m the one responsible for it. You never would’ve gotten hurt if—”

I silenced him then, not able to deal with it any longer. Because that was the thing about being an omega. His hurt was mine and what was already pre-existing seemed to multiply in the face of his, until I could barely take a breath.

So I stole his.

I pressed my lips to his, sucking his breath in, his lips, until the big idiot got a clue and realised that mouth to mouth was the only way to get me out of this fucking hell I was living in.

I thought that killing the Spencers would make everything better, that I’d just ride off into the sunset with my guys, ready to kick arse at a moment’s notice, but unfortunately this was real life, not an action movie. So instead everyone in the stables got a great view of me making out with one of my alphas, catching every hungry, desperate kiss until finally we were forced to pull away and catch our breath.

“I think you’ve got it from here,” Scarlett said with a smile, all her bitch queen attitude gone. “Though when you’re done, you might want to make some time to see Charlie.” Her eyes narrowed. “All of you, because if there was ever a pack that needed therapy—”

“Later, Scar,” Ronan said, shooting her a wink before walking backwards, not letting me out of his sight for a second. “Much, much later.”

Chapter61

The last time I stood in the cottage, it felt like I was enshrouded in a grey fog.

Not now.

I stood there just like I had in front of all of my enemies, back unbowed, my eyes boring into each one of them. But these men weren’t my enemies.

They were mine

“Get your clothes off,” I ordered.

“Don’t you want a shower first?” Jax asked, moving closer.

“I think we’re done questioning the omega’s orders, aren’t we?” Ash asked, those full lips twisting in a smile, right before his hand went to the hem of his shirt. “Stevie calls the shots now.”

“So going on a murderous rampage is what it took to get your head out of your arse?” As soon as the snarky words were out of my mouth, I felt a rush of something. Me, I realised. It was as if everything I was had been offline after we came to the Murphys’ farm, but Stevie was back, baby. Well, for now. But I wouldn’t look a gift horse in the mouth. I nodded to all three of them. “I am calling the shots now and you know exactly what I need.”

Teenage Stevie would have spontaneously gone up in flames at the sight of this, of all three Kelly boys stripping down, taking their clothes off with those quick, economical movements men seem to specialise in. And when they stepped free of them… My eyes ran over their bodies, taking in every hard muscle and even harder swollen cocks and then I did something very strange.

I smiled.

My face felt weird when I did it, like I’d gotten out of practise doing so, and maybe that was it. I wouldn’t, going forward, I decided. The Spencers had given me one thing, I realised, and that was it would be difficult for me to take anything for granted again. I knew I had to grab life with two hands before it was torn away, and right now, that’s what I did.

I stepped in closer, sliding my hands over taut hips, tracing those sharp V’s that led down, down until my palms cupped swollen balls and then slid up just as taut shafts.

“Fuck…” Jax hissed, as my fingers trailed along his length. “Fuck… Fuck…”

Those little gasps, those wide open hazel eyes bleeding green by the second. Yeah, I needed that a lot, so I worked my hand up and down, listening to his breaths come faster.

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