Page 116 of The Stolen Moments Trilogy

“When you and Carter started dating, I should’ve thought of what it would do to Kate. I shouldn’t have given you two my blessing blindly. I should’ve checked up on her to see how she was taking the news. I should have been understanding of her feelings about you two. I won’t make that mistake again.”

I take a sip of my tea and scald my tongue, but it doesn’t hurt anywhere near as much as my bleeding heart. “What are you trying to say, Helen?” I ask, willing myself to stay strong.

She shakes her head and sighs. “You and Carter aren’t children anymore, Emilia. I can’t forbid you two dating. All I can ask for now is that you consider taking a break. Give Carter a chance to be there for his family, instead of being caught between you and Kate. His attention should be on Kate, but it’s you he checks up on when he comes home. Please, Emilia, give Kate a chance to get better. Just seeing you puts her on edge. I just want her to focus on getting better. I just want my daughter to be happy again. I want to see her smile, Emilia, and she won’t do that as long as you’re around.”

I can barely comprehend what she’s saying. She wants Carter and me to take a break? From our relationship?

“If nothing else, please consider moving out temporarily. I don’t think seeing you every day is good for Kate. I know Carter would never dare say this to you, but I’m certain he agrees. It’s obvious you’re holding Kate’s recovery back.”

A lone tear drops down my cheek, and I wipe it away furiously. Helen’s expression wavers for a second, but then she shakes her head.

“Where would I even go, Helen? This is my home now.”

Helen nods in understanding and grabs her bag. She takes out a credit card and holds it out to me. “Just find some other apartment. I understand a lot of students do house-sharing. I’m sure it won’t take you too long to find something. I’ll pay for it until you can get back on your feet. I’m sorry, Emilia. I don’t want to have to ask you this, but I need to put my family first. Besides, this apartment is Carter’s. It’s his home, not yours.”

Her words hit me right where they hurt most. I glance at the credit card she’s handing me and shake my head.

“Please give me some time to think about it.”

Helen takes the card back and nods tersely. “I hope you’ll make the right decision, Emilia. We’re all to blame here, and we all need to work to set things right.”

I nod and flee to our bedroom. At least during the day, I get it to myself. I glance at Kate, who’s leaning against the wall in the hallway. She grins at me wickedly. “I told you it wouldn’t take long. Mom is starting to see you for who you are, huh? Didn’t even take as long as I expected. I’m glad even she doesn’t want you here. Finally, she’s putting me first. I doubt you’ll be able to make the right choice, though. I can’t wait for Mom to realize how fucking selfish you are.”

I ignore her as best as I can and rush into my bedroom. I lie down on the bed and burst into tears, trying as hard as I can to remain quiet. What did I do for Kate to hate me as much as she does? Is loving Carter truly such a crime?

I don’t know how long I’ve been crying when strong arms wrap around me. Carter envelops me in his arms and I turn around to bury my face in his neck. He caresses my hair gently until my sobs die down. I barely manage to tell him about my conversation with Helen without bursting into tears again. Carter kisses my forehead and shakes his head.

“You’re not going anywhere, baby. If it comes down to it we’ll move out together, okay? Don’t take her words to heart. I want you here. I need you here. I’ll talk to her, all right?”

I close my eyes and nod, but my resolve is wavering. I’m starting to think Helen and Kate are right. But even if they aren’t, I don’t see a way forward. Things will never be what they used to be again.

Chapter 50

Emilia

I stare at the email on my laptop. One week. It’s been one week since Helen asked me to leave, and every single day I’m still here she stares at me in disappointment. My mere presence is breaking everyone’s hearts.

I close my laptop and rise from my seat at the dining table just as Kate and Helen return from the hospital. Kate looks annoyed to see me, but at least she looks like she’s doing okay. Helen has been accompanying her to the hospital multiple times a week, and it looks like Kate’s treatment plan is working. It’s not easy on her, though. I can tell she’s truly fighting, and I’m proud of her for it.

“Why are you still here?” she asks, crossing her arms. “I thought Mom asked you to leave Carter’s house. You really make a habit out of intruding where you’re not wanted, don’t you?”

Her words still pierce my heart, but I guess I’ve gotten used to it, because the pain is more numbing than it is searing these days. I just nod at her and glance at Helen. She looks as though she doesn’t quite know how to face me and walks toward Asher’s bedroom instead.

“She did,” I tell Kate. “And you’re right.”

Kate frowns, and I sigh. “You’re right, Kate. You’ve always shared everything with me — every family trip and every holiday, Mother’s Day included. You’ve always made sure your family included me as much as you could, and I started to get used to it. I started to feel like I belong. Like I belong with your family.”

I laugh as a tear drops down my cheek. “You’re right. I’m just a sad girl that wished for someone else’s life. For your life, specifically. You had it all. Loving parents, a brother to be proud of, and that teased you but was still always there for you. You had everything I never had, and I coveted it. I wanted just a bit of what you had. So every time you included me in things and invited me over, I took all I could get. I coveted what was yours, and I coveted you. You were the sister I never had.”

I smile to myself as I remember the broken girl I used to be. The lonely nights, the empty dinner table, the condemnation that comes with living in a town as small as ours, and the warmth the Clarke’s showed me.

“At first, I just wanted to make sure you’d stay friends with me, so I took on all the chores you didn’t want to do. I’d do the dishes and I’d help your mother with the groceries. I did as much as I could to make sure you wouldn’t get rid of me, so I wouldn’t outgrow my usefulness. Over time, that turned into more, though. I started to enjoy spending time with Helen, and both she and Carter started to treat me the same way they treated you. I loved it, Kate. I loved your house and your family. It was in such stark contrast with my own empty and cold house. I craved the love that was so abundant in your family, and I started to think I could have just a little of it if I just tried hard enough. I started to work hard at everything I did so your Mom would praise me, so that she’d want to keep me in your life. The way she treated me made me miss my own mother a bit less. It made me see what it was like to have a Mom, and I wanted more of that. Every decision I’ve made so far has been because I so badly wanted to belong. To belong with you and your family, and I never even realized that there’s no place for me.”

Kate smiles in satisfaction, as though she’s happy I’m finally seeing reason.

“I hated cheerleading, but I did it because you asked me to, Kate. Did you know I was already in love with Carter by then? I fought my feelings as best as I could because I was terrified of hurting you. I broke both his and my own heart because I loved you more than I loved him.”

Kate huffs in disbelief. “Yeah, you did a great job fighting your feelings,” she says. I smile at her sadly and look down at my feet.

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