Page 156 of Filthy Royal

Because he didn’t want to relate to anything she had to say.

But, fuck, that was exactly what it felt like.

The end of them had catapulted him into a suspended state of mourning, an infinite void of jealousy, want, hopelessness, and so much rage.

And it had all been based on lies.

“I thought it hurt when you betrayed me, when you kicked me to the curb and shacked up with Stormhart because you didn’t want me anymore.” He rubbed his chest. “But it’s an altogether different kind of cut to know all of that was just pretend and you didn’t trust me enough to give me the truth.”

Scarlett sucked down a sharp breath. “It wasn’t a matter of trust. It was about survival. I-I truly thought I was doing what was right.”

“By shutting me out?” His pain raged on; a seething storm that refused to be appeased. “You could have told me before I left the dome, the very rotation you almost let me fuck you in that guarded room and then sent me on my way with drugged water, but you said nothing. We could have handled it together.”

“Together?” She laughed, but there was no humor in it. “We weren’ttogetherwhen I waited for you at our secret meeting spot, and my old handler, Egan, turned up instead. We weren’t together when my gift erupted when he tried to rape me, and I killed him, and Darvish caught it all on his sick vids, then threatened to show it to the Consortium and have me executed for murdering my superior.”

Each of her words hit with the force of a blow.

He hadn’t known.

“We weren’t together,” she continued, “when they showed me the live feed of you lying on that tunnel floor, unconscious, Crex’s tail suspended over your skull, ready to smash down if I refused. Or when Darvish showed me his incriminating vids of Luc and told me that he’d share them with the galaxy and destroy my brother’s life unless I cooperated. We weren’t together when his guards held a taster to Luc’s temple and threatened to kill him if I didn’t continue to follow all of Darvish’s orders.” Her eyes looked haunted, as if she were reliving the horror of each moment. “How could I do anything but agree?”

Shock twisted through Damien. He tried to process her words; his rage waning as fast as it came on.

“If I could have saved you from all the pain, I would have.” She swallowed hard, unaware her words had decimated his fury and replaced it with agony—for her. “You may hate me, but the truth is, I hate myself more. Hate what I’ve become.”

Her voice cracked on that final word.

The sound most broke him.

“Scarlett…” He reached for her.

She turned away.

That hurt even worse.

She’d been through hells, and he hadn’t been there.

She’d lied to him. Deceived him. But she’d had no choice. He had, and he hadn’t used it to come back. He left her alone to deal with horrors that would have broken most, and she’d survived. All on her own.

“Every night, I wished for some way to make things right.” Each of her whispered words cut deep. “But… but I couldn’t. I haven’t had a say in what happens to me or those I care about in a long time. I did the best I could to keep you safe.”

At her own expense.

Because he’d allowed himself to think only of her betrayal and stayed away.

A rock the size of his fist dropped from the ceiling and landed nearby.

He glanced up. Froze. For the first time, he noticed shadows flickering across the walls. Pebbles crumbling to the ground.

Shit.Her gift was powering up at the worst possible time. He’d initially mistaken the wild, searing storm pounding against his skin as his fury and guilt. Now he realized it was her gift, the hum of it scraping against his flesh, her shame and pain clawing for its due.

Damien got his head out of his ass and pulled it together fast.

He closed the gap between them and spun her around to face him. “Scarlett, you need to calm down. We both do.”

Scarlett shook her head, hair flying around her face. “I can’t control it when it gets like this.” Panic lit her gaze. “You should get back. If the ceiling collapses again—”

“It’s fine.” Palms wrapping around her shoulders, he drew one exaggerated slow breath after another. “Just follow me. Like this.”

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