Page 56 of Better Together

Remi followed Colt out of the room and closed the door behind her. She took a deep breath and slumped with her back against the door. “Whew.”

“Tell me about it. It’s been a long day,” Colt whispered.

She looked around the living room. “This place is nice.”

“It doesn’t even have a TV,” Colt said, his mouth turning up on the ends.

Remi smiled too. She’d spent many hours with Colt alone, but there was something about being alone with him in what was now their shared home that had her skin prickling with nervousness. “How will we watch sports?”

“Maybe Jameson will let us record the games on the TV in the dance hall during the off-season.”

Remi stuffed her hands into the pockets of her ratty pajama pants. “I guess we should talk?”

Colt rolled his eyes. “You act like we don’t talk all day every day.”

“You know what I mean. About…” Her gaze darted to the bedroom. The only remaining bedroom in their new home.

“I figured you’d have something to say.” He rubbed the back of his neck. “Listen, I know a lot of this is going to be uncomfortable, but it doesn’t have to be. I could share a bed with you, but I can’t share a bed with you if you don’t want to.”

Remi chewed on the inside of her cheek and stared at Colt’s socked feet. “It’s a lot,” she whispered.

“Too much too soon?”

She looked up just as Colt nodded. “Okay. I’ll sleep on the couch.”

“Colt–”

“Don’t worry about it. You know I don’t expect anything like that from you. I’ll never be that guy.”

“I know,” she whispered. Everything was backward, and Remi didn’t know which way was up. She’d shared a bed with men before, and maybe that was her hang-up. Sex had always been a selfish, sinful act, but with Colt–her husband and best friend–it was special and right. She didn’t deserve Colt, and he deserved better than her.

Colt took a step toward her and wrapped his arms around her. She sank into the warmth of his chest and inhaled deep, pushing back against the sadness and shame.

“I hate that this is so tough on you. I just want you to be yourself. I want you to be happy. That’s how you’ve always been, and I don’t want that to change.”

Remi laughed. “I havenotalways been happy.”

Colt hugged her tighter. “You don’t have to tell me about that. Unless you want to.”

“I want to tell you a lot of things,” Remi whispered. “But I–”

“Just wait then. We have a lifetime to talk about everything.”

“I’m sorry.” The words were so soft, she wasn’t sure he’d heard.

“Don’t be. Don’t ever be.”

Colt released her but kept his hands on her shoulders. “You okay now?”

No, she was not okay, but Colt seemed fine, and that was enough. She nodded and grinned.

“Good. I’m stealing a pillow from the bed.” He stalked off toward the bedroom but stopped in the doorway. He turned around and stopped for a second.

“What’s wrong?”

He shrugged. “It’s kind of a bummer that you can’t steal my clothes anymore.”

Of all the things he could have said, that kicked her bleeding heart the most. “What’s mine is yours, right?”

---