Page 23 of Desperately Seeking Kitty

Liar.

I gripped the wheel tighter as I maneuvered through the icy streets to Kitty’s apartment. Geographically, we weren’t very far apart at all. Where I lived in Crescent Cove, Christmas was already in full swing although it was only mid-November.

Thorny Paw Clinic was between the two, both in location and in decor. The reception area of the clinic itself was bright, fun, and festive in an attempt to represent a happy place rather than one to be feared, both for pets and parents alike.

The treatment rooms in the converted stable were more businesslike, but our receptionist Alice still put up little happy touches like white twinkle lights to dispel some of the winter gloom.

Here on the edges of Kensington Square’s business district, the holiday touches were subtler than the Cove’s—just the occasional tinsel bell on light poles or the smiley-faced lit snowman hung on front doors. Once Thanksgiving was past in a week—heaven help me, less than a week now—the upcoming holidays would be in full bloom in downtown Kensington Square as well.

And on the radio I wasn’t paying any attention to? Ol’ Blue Eyes was singing “Jingle Bells”. I’d better find some holiday spirit fast.

As fast as I needed to find a date-slash-girlfriend so my mother wouldn’t ruin the rest of the year by guilting me into dating her latest “perfect find” for me. Last time she’d made sure to let me know the woman she’d picked out still had all her eggs. Which seemed physically inaccurate to me, but whatever.

I had to ask Kitty to come with me to dinner. No, I had tobegKitty.

I could offer her the use of Lucky’s services for Princess at no cost for as long as she needed him, even if I still didn’t know exactly what she wanted to do with him and Princess. Maybe Princess had a far-too-nosy family too? I laughed out loud at that as I turned into the drive for Kitty’s building.

My exhaustion was making me loopy. Now I was going to pimp out my cat to trade for a fake girlfriend for a weekend. Was this really my life?

Apparently it was.

I climbed the front steps, noted that Kitty had two other tenants on the other floors, and rang her buzzer, half expecting her not to answer because it was almost five a.m.

Instead, within seconds, she practically purred over the speaker, “Come in. Door’s open for you.”

Damn if that didn’t sound like an invitation worthy of Rina and Sven.

I headed upstairs and she was standing at the door, holding it open. She had a voluminous towel covering her hair except for one wet curl that had escaped to flirt with her mouth.

I wanted to do very bad things to that mouth.

“You should’ve asked who it was.” I tried to sound stern instead of horny as hell.

“As if anyone else would’ve rung my buzzer at five a.m. How was it? Is he or she okay? Did the car stop?” She tilted her head, her gaze zeroing in on the lapel of my jacket. “Oh, no. It was bad, wasn’t it?”

My head pounded with each of her questions. I followed her gaze to my jacket, my eyes narrowing on the big dark splotch that couldn’t have been anything but blood.

I glanced up to see her cupping her hand over her mouth as tears filled her big dark eyes, and I didn’t think. I pulled her into my arms, shifting my jacket out of my way so I could tug her right up against me.

And I do mean right up, so even the thick fluff of her robe had no chance at hiding the soft fullness of her breasts.

Hot damn. I was delirious. I was imagining things.

“Am I dreaming?” I muttered.

She hauled back and punched me. Hard. In the gut.

At least she hadn’t used the graham cracker box this time.

“Is this really the time for that?”

She was staring down in the direction of my suddenly wakeful dick with nothing short of disgust. I was just tired enough to say what was on my mind as if it was a good idea.

“I’ll have you know plenty of women love my dick, and the rest of me. I used to even get paid for it.”

At the horror that crossed her face, I groaned.

Really, Hauser? You are never going to get laid again, and you know what? You do not deserve to.

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