Page 24 of Midnight Deception

The way he says it causes a shiver to go down my spine, making me feel uncomfortable under the weight of his stare. I don’t know if he sees the discomfort on my face, or he just wants to move on, but he clears his throat and stands to his full height. “Tell me about your lesson with Madame Constance.”

Happy with the sudden change of topic, I quickly run over the events of the day, including the sickness and how I was still feeling weak and sore. I even tell him about my frustrations with how difficult I found it to control my power.

Arms crossed over his chest, he nods, mulling over everything I told him. “That will come with practise, which is why you’re here.”

“This is what I don’t understand. Why am I using my magic if I’ve not learned to control it yet?” Frowning, I rub my hand across my face in confusion, my other one buried in Star’s fur where she leans against my leg in support. “I keep being told how dangerous I am until I learn control.”

My voice is tight as I speak. I’m exhausted and aching from the sickness, and I won’t deny that I’m a little afraid of my newly unleashed powers. It was bad enough before when the presence would take over, but now it’s going to be worse. The idea of hurting someone because I lose control makes me feel sick.

Hearing the tension in my voice, Dune gives me a look of understanding. “You’ve already got an aspect of control, because you’re using your magic constantly with your wolf.” He gestures towards Star before widening his arms to encompass the whole hall. “This room is protected, so you’re able to use your magic at full strength without having to worry about hurting anyone. That allows you to practise using your power and helps with learning control. Not to mention you can use up your magic to keep the levels down until you’ve gained full control.”

The fact that he’s worked out what is making me so uncomfortable about using my power makes me grit my teeth. Am I that obvious, or is he just good at reading others? While he’s not treated me any differently to anyone else, he’s still a witch, and if the queen demanded it, I’m sure he would hurt me.Now who’s prejudiced?I chide myself. I’m feeling defensive and remind myself once more that I’m here against my will. It’s only right that I’m wary and doubtful of those around me.

Taking in my silence, he nods to himself as if I just confirmed something despite not saying or doing anything. Gesturing for me to step onto the mats, he steps back to give me plenty of space. “What have you managed to do with it so far?” he asks as I kick off my boots and walk to the centre of the room.

The presence in me hums, reminding me of the times she’s taken over and saved my ass with my magic, but I shut down that line of thought quickly. Clearing my throat, I frown a little as I think back. “Other than Star, I’ve only really used it for shields.”

“Good, we’ll work on shields today then.” He gestures towards me with an expectant expression. “Show me.”

Raising my brows, I release a breath and look within myself. I try to remember how I did it before. However, that first time I created the shield was the first time I ever used magic, something I had no idea I could do, so I don’t really remember how I did it, only how I felt. Even thinking about it now, I can feel the pain that was tearing through my body as I tried to shift but couldn’t, and eventually, Star ripped from my chest, the shield forming around us in the process. I can still remember how terrified I was at being trapped with a glowing wolf and no idea what was happening.

Focusing on those feelings, I push outwards with my power. My skin tingles as something runs over it. Opening my eyes, I see a slowly growing dome over me. I lose concentration, and it seems to pop like a bubble, the scent of magic disappearing with the shield.

“Good,” he calls, sounding calm. When I glance over, I see his eyes flashing with an emotion I can’t identify. I don’t have time to work it out either as he waves a hand at me. “Try again.”

He has me repeat this over and over, creating shields that only just cover me to ones that almost fill the whole room. Most of the time, my shields collapse before I can complete them, or I’m unable to hold them steady once created, but Dune seems content with my progress. Using magic is hard and exhausting, and my breath is coming in heavy pants, Star leaning against me for support. The way that both Constance and Dune explain calling magic to me is hard to get my head around. When I reach for it, my power feels eager and rushes forward all at once. Whether this is because it’s been locked away for so long or not, I don’t know, but when I voice this thought aloud, Dune frowns and shakes his head.

“It’s not alive. It’s your magic, soyoucontrol it. Not the other way around.”

He makes it sound so simple, and maybe I’m just being dense, but it sure feels like it’s got a mind of its own. My head is throbbing, not from the sickness this time, but because recalling my fear from that night to bring my magic to the surface is hard on me mentally. I feel myself getting more despondent the more we practise, and it’s only Star’s constant reassuring presence that stops me from giving up entirely.

Things become even more difficult when Dune has me attempt to change the density of my shields. He shows me several times, talking through his demonstration calmly each time despite having to repeat himself. I understand the theory of how I need to do it, and he makes it look so simple. It’s putting his instructions into practise that’s hard. Drawing on my memories, I create the shield, but having to focus on changing the density of it requires more concentration, and the memory slips away, causing me to lose control of the shield.

After my shield shatters for what feels like the hundredth time, I let out a low growl of frustration, my hands balling into fists at my sides. Master Dune is about to give me another pep talk and tell me I’m not going to learn control overnight and, logically, I know that. However, my logical brain disappeared with the pounding in my head, and I have to turn away to stop myself from snapping at him.

The reassuring words never come, though, as the shield around the room ripples and someone walks through the door. I’m facing in the other direction, so I can’t see them, but the bond does a little flip in my chest, alerting me to the fact that Atlas just entered.

I’d been hoping after his swift exit this morning that he’d find an excuse not to assist during today’s lesson. I’m really not in the mood to put up with his shit. Unfortunately, my hopes are dashed.

“Just in time,” Master Dune calls out, and the sound of his footsteps tell me he’s moving towards my mate.

Realising that I’m not going to be able to get out of this, I grit my teeth and let out a heavy sigh, attempting to compose myself. My eyes automatically seek out my mate. He’s standing by Dune, kicking off his shoes with far more force than necessary. He’s trying not to look at me, I can tell from the set of his jaw and the tension in his shoulders. Feeling petty and unable to stop myself given the foul mood I’m now in, I give the bond a tug. His eyes flick up to meet mine, and despite himself, there’s a look of longing there that he can’t hide from me. Of course it’s gone in a moment once his mind is able to wrangle his bond under control. My lips flick up into a smug smile, and I watch as his expression shifts into one of disgust.

He turns to Master Dune with a scowl. “Let’s get this over with.”

It seems our truce from this morning is gone, and given my terrible mood, I don’t care right now. Sure, my bond might be crying in my chest at his reaction to me, but I shove those feelings down.

“Does he have to be here?” I call out, ignoring my mate and keeping my focus entirely on Master Dune.

My sensitive wolf hearing picks up his quiet sigh and his muttered comment about needing strength from the goddess to put up with bickering mates, but he hides his frustration like a pro.

“Atlas’s magic reacts a little like yours, and he knows how difficult it can be to control,” he explains, his voice calm and even. “Being mates, you should find it easier to use and control your power around each other, so it’s good for you to practise.”

He’s said this all before, but I still grumble, watching warily as he and Atlas walk onto the mats. I don’t know how he’s planning on using my mate to help with my training, but my stomach twists as a dark thought enters my mind. Dune isn’t going to have Atlas attack me to test my shield, is he? I’mnotready for that, but I bite my lip, not wanting to voice my concerns in front of my now smirking mate.

“Laelia, create a shield.”

Closing my eyes, I focus on those intense feelings I experienced the first night I used my magic, pushing outwards and only opening them again when I feel the magic tingle over me. A small shield of shimmering stars surrounds me. The air is different in here, still and without the movement of others, but the magic of the shield still allows me to breathe fresh air.

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