Page 57 of Midnight Deception

Although the thought of seeing them again makes me feel sick, I nod my head in agreement, finally flicking my eyes up to meet my tutor’s. I’d been avoiding his direct gaze, worried about what I might find there, and even though his expression is neutral, shame colours my cheeks. “You must be really disappointed in me,” I croak out, eyes dropping once more.

There’s a pause, and I can feel how much both Atlas and Nicolai want to jump in and protest, but they both keep their thoughts to themselves, knowing this is an important moment between me and Master Dune.

“Why would you think that?” The question is asked cautiously, gently, as though he’s concerned I might fall apart if he were to speak the wrong way.

I snort and then instantly regret it as my body barks in pain. I shake my head in self-disgust. It’s the slightest of movements, but I know they all see it and recognise it for what it is. “I forgot to shield. That’s literally the first thing you taught me, and I failed. In the end, I used so much power that I had to drag myself away.”

Pathetic. Although I don’t say it aloud, I’m thinking it loud and clear.

“Stop it,” Atlas grits out, taking my chin in his hand and gently moving my head until I’m looking at him. “You’re here. I don’t care if you had to crawl away. You’re alive.”

My heart speeds up at his words, and warmth spreads through me. Perhaps we can make this work after all.

“I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I agree with the witch,” Nicolai chimes in, his arms tightening around me.

With the two of them touching me, holding me close like this, I feel safe, and I can almost forget about the chaos surrounding us.

“Laelia, I would never be disappointed that my student survived a fight, especially one where they were at such a disadvantage,” Dune starts, and the sincerity in his voice gives me enough hope to raise my gaze once more. “My training is to make those odds better and make you a force to be reckoned with, but in that moment, you did what you had to in order to survive,” he continues. “You also chose not to kill them and then had the forethought to make sure they wouldn’t be able to follow you while you were weak. Most of us would have killed them to ensure that, but you used mercy.”

His words mean more to me than I thought they would, showing me just how much I needed to hear this. I’ve not known him long, but the fact that he’s never once treated me differently because of what I am and has continued to teach me just like he would any other makes me trust him. His blunt character reassures me that he means what he’s saying. He wouldn’t lie to make me feel better.

He’s making it sound like I was being merciful out of the goodness of my heart. Sure, I didn’t want to kill them, since I’m trying to prove I’m not like that, but they attacked me, and I defended myself in whatever way possible. Sighing, I look at Atlas and then slowly glance over my shoulder. “Will you help me sit up?” I ask them quietly, and to my surprise, they both help without complaint, Nicolai resting my body against his and Atlas moving closer when he sees me swaying.

With them helping me like this, I can look around more clearly, and my eyes flick from Dune to Kano, who’s still watching me with a frown.

“Because I don’t want to be the monster that they think I am.” My answer is in response to what Master Dune said, but for some reason, I feel compelled to keep my gaze on Kano. You would have thought it would be Atlas who needs to hear this, seeing as I’m almost a hundred percent sure my attackers were from the sect he’d been part of. However, it’s Kano I feel drawn to, like he needs to hear this for some reason. Taking a deep breath, I release my half-brother from my stare and look back at my instructor. “Besides, you’re making me sound much better than I actually was. I was out of magic, even Star disappeared.”

“No one who knows you would ever think you’re a monster, Laelia,” Nicolai murmurs into my ear, brushing back some of my hair that’s fallen forward.

Master Dune nods in agreement to my mate’s statement and crosses his arms over his chest. “The important thing is, you’re still here. We’ll work on everything else.”

“Laelia.”

Surprised to hear the female voice, I frown slightly and glance around, finally spotting Luna in the corner of the room. She usually fills a space with her presence, her light and bubbly personality making her impossible to miss, but I didn’t even notice she was in the room until just now. Her shoulders are hunched forward, and her face is racked with guilt. Her cheeks are dry but tear-stained, and her eyes are red from crying.

“I am so sorry. I should have walked you to the training hall like I was supposed to. Then they wouldn’t—”

Hearing the devastation in her broken voice, I refuse to let her continue. “Luna, stop.” My voice is quiet but surprisingly powerful. Everyone else in the room is silent, falling back so the two of us can have this moment. “They would have found a way to get to me no matter what. This isn’t your fault,” I promise, holding her gaze so she can see the truth in my eyes.

I mean everything I say, but I can’t help but wonder at the timing of everything. How did my abductors know that Luna would be exhausted and I’d offer to walk myself to training? It seems like too much of a coincidence. Did the queen have something to do with it? She was the reason why Luna was so exhausted in the first place…

Shaking my head, I let out a groan as my body protests again, my shoulder throbbing. Literally every part of me aches, and there are other injuries such as cuts and scrapes that should be a distant memory by now, but they sting and burn as if I were a human without the benefit of fast healing. I have to take a moment to swallow back the nausea building in my stomach before I begin to speak.

“If I’ve been out for two days, why hasn’t my shoulder healed? I feel awful.”

Atlas is staring at me like he thinks I’m going to faint or disappear completely, his eyes tracking every movement I make, and Nicolai’s grip is too tight to be casual. They are scared, I realise with surprise. This event shook them, and me being unconscious for two days wouldn’t have helped that.

Master Dune clears his throat, and I pull my gaze from my mates to look at him. “We think it’s because you were drained of your power. Whatever you were stabbed with was spelled to disable your magic, and it must be affecting your healing abilities too.”

“We need to find a way to get her back on her feet as soon as possible,” Atlas comments, sharing a look with Kano. “She’s vulnerable like this.”

All of a sudden, an idea hits me, and I know exactly what I need to help me recover. Whether the goddess struck me with the inspiration or I just thought of it myself, I have no idea, but the surety of it rings in my chest.

I glance at my mates and then up at Kano, the corner of my lips twitching slightly. “I need the moon.”

ChapterTwenty-One

It takes a while to convince the queen to let me leave Haven, but she reluctantly agrees when she sees how slowly I’m healing. After all, I can barely leave my bed, let alone train to control my power like she wants. Everything is a struggle, and a constant pull in my chest to be outside and under the moon is driving me crazy. My skin feels too tight, like I’m going to burst through it and the human part of me will fall away to reveal the darkness within. I need to get out of here, even if it’s just for an hour.

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