Page 98 of The Payback

“Yeah, there’s no way in fuck I’m walking away from my wife. We might have started as work, but I refuse to walk away, and I’m not letting her walk away, either. And I can appreciate that she wants more. Things that I can’t give her, that maybe you can.”

“Like what?” Nik asks, his fingers clenching the armrests, knuckles going white with tension.

“Like more children.”

The room goes utterly silent as my words land between us. The vasectomy I had when I was twenty was necessary. Still, the ensuing infection and severity of it led my doctor to remind me time and time again that a reversal would unlikely be successful. Especially since so many years have passed.

“Dimitri,” Eleanor breathes. I shake my head that I don’t want to talk about it yet, and she respects my wishes. “What are you suggesting with all of this?”

“Exactly what Nik so poorly joked about earlier. A team.”

Nik exhales harshly. “You want to what? Share Ellie? Live together after all this is done, hoping we don’t piss each other off enough that we pull out the blades?”

“Precisely. If that is what you want.” I look at Eleanor again.

She fumbles over a few words, nothing forming a complete thought as she jumps from response to response, never letting one fully form before she’s on to the next.

“You don’t have to answer right now. But I’m in this, Eleanor. Whatever it looks like. Think about it. Both of you.”

I stand and head towards the door, giving them time to talk again. If this has any hope of working, I need to bend a little. I may be thepakhan, but that stops as soon as we discuss a relationship. I refuse to be the man my father was.

Two peanut butter and banana sandwiches later—yeah, I found Nik’s stash—I wander back upstairs. Neither came down, and the apartment feels empty without their voices around me.

Nik’s door is closed, and I hear him on the phone, likely dealing with the restaurant I asked him to check in on earlier today. I step into the suite and find it empty. But as I pass the door to the closet, I hear murmured words from within. It’s open just a crack, and when I widen it and pass from my side to Eleanor’s, I see her sitting cross-legged on the floor, cooing into her phone.

I lean to one side, trying to see the screen without thinking about it. I just act.

A high-pitched squeal comes from the phone, and there’s a flash of hands.

“What are you making ‘gimme’ hands at, baby?” Eleanor asks. The hands go again, and my wife peeks over her shoulder, finding me standing there, leaning against the doorframe as I watch her with her daughter.

“Please don’t,” I beg as her thumb hovers over the red button to end the call. She looks at me curiously, her dark eyes roving over my face.

Whatever she sees makes her sigh and pat the floor beside her. “Come on, then. You can’t just stand back there; you’ll steal all her attention. And if you leave, she’ll cry.”

Not one to look a gift horse in the mouth, I cross the small space and fold my body until I sit beside her. Meeting someone’s child is an enormous step. One I don’t think I deserve yet. “You’re sure?” I ask.

“Not entirely, but you’re the one who wants out of this life—who risked a lot to come to Interpol and get these things in motion. While I don’t entirely trust you, you’re trying to do the right thing, whatever the reason, and that earns you an inch. Don’t fuck it up.”

She turns towards the screen, leaving me speechless.

“Dimitri, this is Bella,” Eleanor says. “Baby, say hi.”

“Fuck!” Bella cheers at the phone, showing off her tiny front teeth. They have the same gap that Nik used to have when he was a kid, and the more I look at Bella on the screen, the more I see him in her features.

“Dammit, Ellie, we just got her to stop saying that!” a woman calls from the phone.

“I know! Sorry, my bad. I haven’t had to watch my language here, and it slipped.”

“Who is that?” I ask as Bella makes kissy faces at the phone again.

“Bella’s godmother.”

“Who willNOTshow you her face in case this goes sideways. The less information you have, the better.”

“That’s a good idea,” Eleanor says beside me.

Grumbling, I mutter, “So much for that inch.”

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