Page 14 of Cross the Line

“I’m not. Cara isn’t what I want, Raven.” With that, I walk past her and down to my room. As soon as I’m inside, I close the door and drop onto the bed, resting my head in my hands.

What the hell am I going to do now?

Chapter Eight

Raven

I’ve sat on his bed, taken a shower, and eaten, yet I still feel unsettled. Something is gnawing away at my insides, and I can’t figure out what it is.

He broke up with her right in front of everyone. And for me. I know it was. And I’m going to break his fucking heart. What kind of person does that make me? What kind of monster?

I shove the clothes into the bag, knowing damn good and well I can’t be here when he gets back. I have to get the hell out of here. I have to start putting my plan into action. I need to focus on what I’m going to do, not on Cross. And that’s where my focus has been on him.

Not that I minded at all. I like being around Cross. I like the feeling I have when I’m with him. I like knowing he wants me the way I want him. But is that enough? Could it be enough?

Shaking my head, I already know the answer to that. I shouldn’t even be here thinking about it. I sniffle a little as I load my bag with the clothes the girls have gotten for me. When I feel the tear fall, I reach up and wipe it away. I can do this. I’m stronger than this.

Once I have everything I need, I heft the bag over my shoulder and walk out of his room, taking one last look before I go. God, I can still smell him in here. I can feel him even when he isn’t here. A shiver runs along my spine as I close my eyes for a short second. Then I step into the hallway and close the door behind me.

Taking a deep breath, I walk down the hall and out into the main room. I glance around at the guys who stayed behind and the girls as they laugh and talk amongst themselves. I’m going to miss this. I’m going to miss all of it. The laughter, the way they helped me. The way he helped me.

“What’s up?” Evie asks as she looks between my face and the bag on my shoulder. My heart sinks further into my chest. I hate to leave her too.

“It’s time.”

“What? Cross just left, though. Does he know you’re leaving?” she asks.

“No. I told him I’d be here when he got back, but I can’t, Evie. I can’t say goodbye to him.”

“Then don’t. Stay, Raven. You can stay here. You don’t have to go anywhere,” she’s repeating what I’ve heard repeatedly.

“I have to. I don’t think I’ll be able to go if I see him again.”

“There’s a reason for that, Raven.”

“I know there is, but things wouldn’t work, Evie. None of this would work. I have a plan, and I need to see it through,” I tell her.

“I wish you would reconsider,” she says softly.

“I love being here. I love what you guys share, and I’ve loved being a part of it. Trust me, if there were another way to do this, I would.” Evie reaches out and grabs my hand in hers before she smiles sadly.

“I get it. I wish you all the best, Raven but remember you are always welcome here. Never think you aren’t. You can come back here anytime you want,” she tells me, making my chest clench.

“That means a lot to me.” I pull her into a hug as my eyes find Griz’s. He knows what this is too. His smile slowly fades, and he just stares at me before finally pulling his gaze away. At first, I think he will call Cross and tell him since he pulled his phone out of his pocket, but then he just stands there, staring at it before sliding it back inside his jeans. I blow out a breath of relief.

“You have the money the guys gave you?” Evie asks.

“I do. I hate taking it.”

“Nonsense. They want to help.”

“They have. You all have. I don’t think I can thank you enough for everything you’ve done for me.”

“You don’t need to. Just remember that we’re here for you,” she says again. My chest swells as I think about everything. Could I come back here? I don’t think so, not after what I have planned.

“Thank you.” One more hug and I’m heading toward the door when Griz stops me.

“I know he doesn’t know,” he says as I nod.

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