Page 35 of The Sweetest Note

10

LENNON

Lorna Shore is streamed so loudly into the room, I jerk awake and scream. I’m all about deathcore when I’m in the mood for it, and Turner can growl with the best of them, but I feel as if I just closed my eyes. Whimpering, I shiver as I look around. I’m all alone. Falling over onto my side in the fetal position due to the straightjacket, I do my best to bury my head between my thighs to drown out the music.

However, as flexible as I am, I can’t outlast the music, which washes over me. I can’t think, my eyes are so tired they tear at the strain of being awake. Clearly these people chose violence today.

Abruptly, after what feels like hours, the door opens to my padded cell. I can’t even call it a room after what I’ve been through. Breathing hard from the strain of being woken up by such an intense music choice, my nerves are on fire from overstimulation.

“Hello, Miss Lennon, did you sleep well?” Xav’s shiny shoes appear under my eyes and I swear I can hear the amusement in his voice.

“I slept like an angel,” I rasp, eyes rising to his nose. I refuse to stare into his soulless eyes, and besides, the last time I did, he slapped me. I’m crazy, not dumb.

Xav snorts. “As delightful as usual. I’m hoping for an attitude change soon, and was hopeful the medication would help.”

“The medication makes me feel like a zombie,” I complain.

Xav bends down, grabbing my arms and lifting me to my feet. I wobble a bit from disuse of my limbs, begging my body not to fall. I don’t want to rely on Xav for anything, I’ll only pay for it later.

“You’re disgusting, your hair is matted, and I can only imagine what the rest of you looks like. I’ll need to tell the doctor you’ve been neglecting your personal care activities,” he snorts, grabbing my hair at the nape of my neck and pushing me forward.

I hold my sigh inside, knowing the truth. I look a mess after days of his “correction” and “therapy”, and I feel gross after being used as Colly’s cum rag. The medication dulls the horrors of what’s been happening, and he hasn’t stuck his cock inside of me.My body belongs to me. My skin can be wiped clean, I can shower, I’ll survive.

Leaving the room that’s become another form of torture, he forces me to walk slightly ahead of him.

“Eric,” Xav snaps at an orderly. “Please have Nurse Elaine meet me at the showers. This patient needs to be cleaned up. We have therapy scheduled for today, and the day is wasting away with Miss Lennon’s slovenly care and late sleeping.”

The orderly shrugs, looking surprised by the mention of time as he glances at his watch. “I asked if you wanted us to get her up for the day hours ago, but you said to leave Lennon in her room to meditate.”

Meditate my ass.I school my features from the angry snarl I feel forming on my lips, smoothing it away. I refuse to react. Xav pulls my head back to stare at my face. Annoyed by the lack of expression, he grunts, tightening his hand in my hair until pain radiates through my scalp. Releasing a small gasp of pain, I blink back the reactive tears. Tears he doesn’t deserve to see.

“She was meditating, but I didn’t realize she smelled this badly,” Xav scoffs. My fingers itch for a knife. I usually leave the violence to Roark or Turner, but I’m alone here. I struggle to keep my breath even, digging my nails into my palms to keep back the clawing anxiety that I’ll never get out of here. “Just do it, Eric. You’re paid to follow orders.”

The man shrugs, and Eric’s eyes slowly undress me. Everyone here is a creep.

“Can I help with her therapy soon, Sir? I feel as if I have special techniques I can use to help,” he says with a smirk.

I dig deeper into my palms, digging my socked feet into the cold floor. I’m desperate to keep the room from spinning, I need to ground myself in this nightmare so I can control one small thing. My body is wound tightly, knowing my day is guaranteed to become worse at any moment.

“Let’s start with locating Nurse Elaine for me, son, and then we’ll go from there,” Xav says encouragingly. Eric nods eagerly, grabbing his radio to call her, already walking in the direction of her office. Nurse Ratched can bite me, the woman is vile.

Xav chuckles under his breath, pushing me forward. “I’m sure Elaine is watching porn again at her desk and won’t enjoy the interruption. Don’t expect her to be gentle today, girl.”

She never is.When I can get away with it, I refuse to speak to him. My commentary runs in my head, my snark strong… but only in my mind. The only time I let my mouth run is when I’m on the table, when he’s going to hurt me either way. There’s no point being good when I know the knife is coming regardless of what I do or don’t say.

Xav pushes me hard into the bathroom, straight into the tiled wall. Turning my face to the side, I grunt as I run into it. I really hate not having my hands to brace for impact. I’ll never take that for granted again.

“Quick thinking,” he murmurs. “While I’m glad your nose isn’t broken, it means your metabolism for medication is much higher than I previously thought. I am going to need to take this into consideration when adjusting it.”

I can’t help the whimper as it escapes, shame filling me for the show of weakness as Xav pulls me back to him by my hair. Nurse Ratched must have run here, because she pushes into the room slightly out of breath and flushed. Or…she had a quickie? Ew.

Forcing this thought away because there are only so many people she could be fucking, and the thought of her having sex with anyone is disgusting to me.

“There you are, Nurse Elaine. I dislike waiting for people, as you well know,” Xav says, walking me further into the bathroom towards the showers. He’s yet to release my hair, and my scalp is on fire.

Swallowing back the tears, I blink hard. It’s too early for them, and I have a feeling my day is barely getting started.

“I’m so sorry, Mr. Xav,” she coos. The staff has a healthy fear of this man, and it speaks volumes for his unpredictability. You never know what you’re going to get with him, though typically, his violence is directed towards me.

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