Page 15 of Sebastian

His lips curl up, but it doesn’t look like a smile. “It is a good life.”

When he doesn’t continue, I whisper, “But?”

He rubs the back of his neck and lets out a haggard chuckle. “But. There shouldn’t be a ‘but,’ and yet, there it is.”

“Do you want to talk about it?” I hold my breath.

Christian doesn’t answer for several slow breaths, then takes a long drink of his beer. “But…” He shakes his head. “Why don’t you tell me what exactly a ‘collab’ would involve?”

I gasp as the vise around my lungs suddenly loosens. My pulse skyrockets and blood whooshes past my ears. OMG, this is really happening. Christian is considering a collab with me. Holy fucking shit.

“Uh, well, it really depends on us and how we want to structure it.” I don’t sound like myself. Or rather, I don’t sound the way I feel. Inside, I’m in nuclear meltdown mode, alarms clanging and my mind spinning trying to figure out what it needs to do next. But words are flowing out of my mouth like I actually know what I’m talking about.

“With the guys I’ve worked with in the past, we shoot enough footage so we all have enough material for our respective pages. But since you don’t have a page, I can host the video on mine and we can split the proceeds. I’ll make sure to provide all the reports, you know, for full transparency.”

Christian actually grins at that last part. “I have a feeling I don’t need to worry about you short-changing me.”

I smile back at him and shrug. “You never know. Just in case.”

“And what about production costs?”

The question sends a disproportionate thrill through me—does he want to talk profit margin? Does he want to see my spreadsheets? I clasp my hands in my lap so I don’t start waving them around in excitement.

“Production costs are pretty low. I already have all the equipment, so we’d only need to find a place to film. We can do it at my place since it’s all set up already.”

Christian nods like that all makes sense to him.

“I have a standard contract that lays it all out, if you want to take a look at it. It’s all open to negotiation, of course.”

Christian’s eyes crinkle at the edges as he smiles and my heart does a somersault in my chest. “A standard contract, huh? Sounds legit.”

“Yeah, well, I try.” My heart somersaults again.

He growls—it’s probably just a hum, but it sounds like it’s coming from deep in his chest. It reverberates through me and I shudder in response.

Under the table, I pinch the skin on my wrist. The restaurant doesn’t vanish around me, so this must be real. I’m not dreaming or hallucinating. I’m actually talking to Christian about working together. He actually looks like he might say yes.

“You’ve given me a lot to think about,” he says.

Oh god, say yes, please say yes. “Do you, uh, have any other questions? I can send you everything to review. There’s the contract, but I have other stuff too, like a content usage guide, sample marketing plans, hard and soft limits list—” I snap my mouth shut to stop myself because I’m rambling and Christian’s giving me that grin again.

“You’ve thought of everything, haven’t you?”

“I’m sure there’s something I’ve missed.” Like a guide on what to do when you’re chatting with your biggest celebrity crush about shooting a porn video together.

Christian nods. “Send me what you’ve got.”

I swallow down the sudden wave of happiness that threatens to overwhelm me. It rises up, filling every nook and cranny, until it feels like I’m going to burst with it. I want to jump up and down. I want to call the guys and tell them everything. I want to sit and cry because I really can’t believe this is happening to me.

I nod and swallow again so I can actually speak. “Yeah, no problem. I’ll do it when I get home.”

Christian takes that deep breath and his chest expands. He lets it out slowly and when he speaks, he sounds a little shaky too. “Awesome, I’m looking forward to it.”

CHAPTER EIGHT

CHRISTIAN

I click on Sebastian’s email and stare at the number of attachments listed at the bottom. I’d be annoyed if I wasn’t so amused. When Sebastian warned me that he liked having everything documented in writing, I hadn’t realized he meant a literal mountain of paperwork.

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