Page 144 of Diamond Angel

“Please,” he begs. His sunken eyes are suddenly clear. Certain. “Please, Ilarion. I can’t live a broken man. I can’t ask my daughters to take care of a broken shell of a person. They’ve done enough of that already.”

“That’s their choice to make.”

“And what aboutmychoices?” he protests, rocking back and forth in the chair with a subtle scraping of its legs on the concrete. “I deserve to decide how I live. And how I die. And since the day I chose to betray you, I always knew, deep down, that this was going to be my end. One bullet. A clean death. Painless. It’s more than I deserve, especially from you. But I’m asking anyway.”

I squeeze my fists so hard the knuckles groan. “I promised both your daughters I would bring you home safely. I promised Adam.”

He keeps rocking. Back and forth, back and forth. “You shouldn’t have promised them anything. Even if you bring me back alive, I will be destroyed. My body, my mind… I won’t live as a burden to my daughters.” He breaks off with a sob. “A-and, my boy, my little Adam—I can’t bear for him to see me like that. Please, Ilarion. Please.”

Fuck me.

I stare back at the old man and remember a time when I used to hate him. I wanted him to fuckingburn.But now…

Things have changed.

“Let me try to get it out of you.”

He smiles serenely. He still looks hopeless and resigned, but a flicker of realization still twitches his mouth up. “You really do love her, don’t you?”

I don’t bother asking which “her” he’s referring to. “I do.”

Archie nods. “Then I die knowing you will take care of my family.”

“I give you my word.” I can’t forget that I made a promise to his wife before she died, too.

My hands are tied here. Maybe we were always going to end up in this position, him and I. Fate has been coming at us like a runaway fucking train for a long time now. I’m only now realizing that we’vebothbeen tied to the tracks.

The heaviness of what I must do settles over me. There is no backing out of this.

“They’re my family now, too.”

I take my gun out and cock it. Archie doesn’t so much as flinch at the sound. “I was wrong about you, Ilarion. You are not your father’s son.”

I tighten my grip on the gun. “Don’t get sentimental on me now, old man.” The gravel in my voice surprises both of us.Fuck, when did he start meaning something to me, too?

Archie smiles. “Tell them…tell them I l-love them.” A hitch in his voice drowns out the last part of his message, but it doesn’t require repeating. They already know.

I wait for a moment when he looks down.

He doesn’t see the bullet coming.

He doesn’t see death at all.

It’s the least I could give him.

59

TAYLOR

“I want Grandpa!” Adam cries, throwing his hands in the air. “Heneverleaves without saying goodbye!”

“I know, baby, but this time, um…there was something important he needed to do.”

I’d brought him into the kitchen to try and distract him with a sweet snack. But one Biscoff cookie later, he started asking about Dad again. I’m running out of options.

Adam narrows his eyes at me. For a second, I don’t see my sweet, innocent little boy; I see the man he will become. I see Ilarion.

“My love,” I start, “I know you miss Grandpa, but—"

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