Page 94 of Diamond Angel

“Her name’s Edna. She comes highly recommended.”

“Celine, Adam doesn’t need a nanny.”

“Of course he does. We can’t be with him all the time. And eventually, you’ll find a job, and maybe even a boyfriend. I’ve spoken to Edna over the phone and she sounds wonderful.”

“Celine, I really appreciate all of this, but—”

“You don’t have to thank me, Tay. I want to help. It makes me feel good to know that I can make your life a little easier. It couldn’t have been very pleasant living out of a suitcase all these years.”

I have to bite my tongue from turning down her offerings. As sweet as the gestures are, neither one sits well with me.

“It honestly wasn’t that bad,” I tell her. “And as for Adam, I enjoy doing everything myself. If I needed extra help, Dad was always around. I never wanted a nanny.”

Cee’s gaze snaps to mine and her smile wavers. “I’m being pushy, aren’t I?”

“That’s not it at all,” I say quickly. “I just don’t need that specific type of help. We’re just very different people now, Cee. And I think that maybe you’re trying to live vicariously, and—”

I stop short when I see the way Celine’s mouth falls open.Fuck.I spoke wrong.

“You think I’m trying to live vicariously through you?”

“No, that’s not—I mean, it’s what I said, but it’s not what I meant.”

Her smile has disappeared entirely. She shifts from one leg to the other. She still wrings her hands together when she’s agitated. At least that hasn’t changed.

“Cee, I’m sorry. That’s not what I meant at all. I’m just not good at putting this stuff into words.”

“No, you’re right.” She sighs and smooths her hands over her sides. “Adam is your son, not mine. I have no right to plan nurseries for him or hire nannies on his behalf.”

Yup. I’m a bitch.

“It was a wonderful, thoughtful gesture.”

“It was pushy and rude and obnoxious,” she counters, her voice soft and self-conscious.

“I was just taken aback.” Shit, I really have put my foot in my mouth. “I wasn’t expecting it. But now that I think about it, he would love this room. And a nanny might even be helpful.”

She glances at me out of the corner of her eyes. “You’re backtracking.”

“Yes, I am. Please let me.”

That almost gets a smile out of her. “You’re not wrong. Maybe I was trying to live vicariously through you. I just…” She sighs heavily. “I’ve wanted to have a family for so long.” Her shoulders rise and fall heavily as her nose screws up tightly. “And now, I’m crying. Wonderful. Fucking perfect.”

It’s the first time since being reunited that I’ve seen her composure crack.

It makes me love her even more.

“Come here,” I say as I gather her up into my arms.

She doesn’t hug me back very convincingly, but she lets me embrace her anyway. When I pull back, she looks at me for a split second before she cringes. “That was awkward, wasn’t it?”

“Could’ve been worse. Not much worse, but worse.”

She laughs, but it doesn’t dispel any of the nervous energy that surrounds her. “I don’t have a lot of practice,” she explains. “The people I hug are colleagues and society friends. I can’t remember the last time I’ve had a real hug from someone I’m close to.”

A lump rises in my throat and a million follow-up questions spiral through my head, but I keep my mouth shut.

“You ever need a real hug, just come to me. I’ve got you.”

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