Page 112 of The Lessons

He replied almost instantly.

Just a few minutes away. Be there soon.

Shit fuck.

“Natalie, we need to talk.” Ryan’s voice sounded urgent, but I didn’t dare go near the door. I just sat there, frozen, my eyes glued to the little dark crack under the door.

Then I heard some movement in the hall—footsteps. Oh, shit, was Ian here already?

“Excuse me, Ma’am? Ma’am? Sorry to bother you, but have you seen Natalie?”

I heard a husky voice answer. Oh, thank God, it was Mrs. Hankton from next door. I couldn’t hear her answer, but whatever she said, Ryan came back to my door, paused, and then left.

Once I heard him on the front steps, I rushed to the window and peered after him from behind the curtain. On his way across the street, he actually passed Ian. I’m pretty sure my heart ceased beating for a few moments. But they didn’t know each other from Adam, so when Ryan offered a chin lift and Ian responded with a tight nod, I knew it was only man-code for acknowledging each other’s presence.

Once Ryan was out of sight, I leaned back against the wall to release my breath, which I’d been holding for who knows how long. A few seconds later, there was another knock on my door.

This time, it was my date.

Ryan

I waited for about ten minutes a little bit up the street from her apartment. I didn’t want to plant myself right in front; she could have seen me as she came home and avoided me. So my plan was to wait until I saw her go into her apartment and then knock on her door. So you can imagine my surprise when she came out of the building a few minutes later, clearly dressed for a date, and walking with some douchebag in Tevas.

I’m no fashion plate, but who the fuck wears Tevas on a date?

And more importantly,she’d been in there? She had been in her apartment, and she hadn’t opened the door.

My heart sank.

Must. Not. Ambush. Teva guy.I gripped the handles of my bike until my knuckles whitened and watched them cross the street and get into his blue Honda Civic. I’d spent my life trying to control my temper, trying not to fly off the handle at every little thing like my dad. For the most part, I was pretty good at keeping my shit together, but you know the expression, “I was so mad, I saw red”? Yeah, that was happening. It’s a thing.

The car pulled into traffic and set off toward downtown. Naturally, I followed them.

Chapter Thirty-nine

The following Thursday…

Ryan

I had to bum a graduation invitation off someone in my cohort as I hadn’t ordered any for myself. I mean, really, who was I going to invite? Lambo? Right.

As I addressed it, my stomach felt tight. After my stint as the Night Stalker, I’d spent most of my waking hours preoccupied with Natalie, going over our time together. When I’d first noticed her in the library, she’d been cracking jokes at the front desk, and I’d become immediately intrigued. I’d followed her at a distance and spent almost half an hour pacing, trying to figure out a way to strike up a conversation—not that what I ended up doing was Shakespeare or anything, but hey, it had worked.

One of my favorite memories was how she’d blushed something fierce when I’d asked her if she’d touched herself. And the day we got stuck in the elevator…although the part about how I had an ethical meltdown was still something I’d rather forget. When that thought surfaced, I distracted myself by thinking about the day she came to my soccer game. Fuck, if there was anything that made me feel protective and possessive of her, it was having my teammates eye her hungrily like a pack of wolves. And the kicker was I was sure she was starting to have feelings for me too.

That is, until I yanked the fucking rug out from under her.

Still, I couldn’t believe she’d started dating already.

Seeing her with that guy fucking tore me up. Not only because I was imagining them doing all the things we’d practiced, but because I was imagining her laughing with him, smiling with him—that’s really what killed me. Because she wasn’t supposed to bewith him—she was supposed to bewith me. And it was all my fault.

Thursday - Seventeen days P.R.A.

Natalie

The date with Ian was good. He was a gentleman, and I managed to get away with only a kiss on the cheek.

Oh, boy, do you hear me? I mean, he was attractive in a cute kind of way, but I knew he was nothing like Ryan. So of course, now I was worried I’d forever be comparing every man I dated to him. Was this what happened when you lost your virginity to someone? Was it normal to have an image of them haunt you like this?

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