Page 40 of The Lessons

“It’s interesting to me that you didn’t hear the statement in that way. Why do you think that is?”

I looked down at my hands. “I honestly don’t know.”

“Do you think this relates to your concerns about intimacy?”

“I mean, I’m sure they do somehow. I…I don’t know. I’m not really the kind of person who is used to all this self-reflection.”

Lisa smiled. “Well, it’s good we have our time set aside then, isn’t it? We can explore more of this during our sessions.”

“Yeah, I guess so.” I was unable to shake the feeling that I’d failed or something. Then suddenly, I remembered the text message from Brad. “Oh, wait. Guess what?”

Dr. Lerner looked surprised. “What?”

“You will be happy to hear I have a date next week.” I smiled, tremendously pleased that I had some evidence to show my therapist of being afunctionalhuman being.

“That’s great, Natalie. When was the last time you had a date?”

I rolled my eyes up toward the ceiling. “Uh, years.”

“Are you excited?”

I paused before responding. I hadn’t had time to stop and think about that. But yes, of course I was. I mean, why wouldn’t I be? “Yes,” I said confidently. “I am.”

“Good. That’s real good, Natalie. Now just remember, though, go slowly. You are still working with Mr. Andrews, and our agreement stipulates that both parties remain celibate during the work.”

“Oh, you don’t have to worry about that,” I replied. “It’s just coffee.”

Chapter Twelve

Natalie

“So where’s this place?” I asked as Josh and I walked down the street from his hotel. It was a perfect summer afternoon: the sky was a brilliant blue, and the city was a warm seventy-eight degrees. Highly unusual for San Francisco.

“It’s just a few blocks over. You look gorgeous, by the way.”

I was wearing some of my summer clothes, now that the weather had blessed us with non-artic numbers. I had on a red tank top and a flouncy white skirt. It felt great to get some sun on my bare skin.

“Thanks, Joshie. I can’t believe you’re leaving already. I feel like you just got here.”

“I know.” Josh wrapped his arm around my shoulder. We hadn’t beentogetherfor years, but I still loved being in that nook. He was tall and broad shouldered, and I fit in there perfectly. “But don’t worry, LeeLee. You’re in San Francisco now. You know I’ll—”

“Natalie?”

As I looked up, my breath caught. I knew that voice.

“Ryan.” I stammered. “Um. Hi. What are you doing here?”

He chuckled and looked around. We were on the sidewalk. Crap. I hadn’t meant it to sound accusatory.

“I’m just running a few errands.” He turned to Josh. “Hi, I’m Ryan,” he said, offering his hand.

“Josh.” My friend mirrored Ryan. “You didn’t mention you’d already made friends, LeeLee.”

Ryan turned toward me and raised an eyebrow at the name.

“It’s a nickname,” I muttered as I tried to send a secret message with my eyes.Do not tell Josh how we know each other. Goddamn it, Ryan, if you fuck this up, so help me…

“I metLeeLeeat the library. She helped me find a book.”