Page 34 of Malachi

“Yes, baby. I can see Berkeley for you. Once you get back on your feet and—”

“Jae. That’s the thing. I’m not talking about later. I’m talking about now. That’s where I want to get back on my feet. That’s where I want to start this new chapter. If I wait, I’ll never go. You know it, and so do I.”

“Now? But, I just got you back,” she whined.

“And you’ll have me forever. I just feel like I have to do this for myself and for my future. Even with only two thousand dollars to my name, I’m willing to risk it. I’ve been looking for jobs there. Once I find one, I’m out, Jae, and I’m leaving the rest up to God. Something there belongs to me and I won’t stop until I’ve secured it all.”

“That’s what you’ve been doing online all day?”

“Yes. Looking for any available positions at the private schools.”

“They pay best.”

“I know.”

“I could use the money I have left in my account and borrow an additional two thousand dollars from my dad until things are better. Whatever it takes.”

“I’ll match your two thousand,” she blurted.

“Huh?” I squinted as if it would help me comprehend better.

“I’ll match your two thousand.”

There were two thousand dollars left in my account after my automated bills tore holes in it for months before my mother was able to cancel everything, including rent payments. The thirteen thousand I’d saved went down the drain and there was no way they could recoup any of it. Even Jae had tried. The two thousand dollar a month apartment where I rested my head swallowed most of the funds. The rest were captured by smaller bills that added up to large amounts when combined. Internet, cable that I never watched, streaming channels, subscriptions, cell phone, and utilities.

“Stop. You don’t have to. I’m sure my dad will be—”

“Take mine and take his. You can’t lose going to Berkeley with six. You don’t have to pay mine back and I’m almost certain you won’t have to pay his back, either. We both want you to win and follow your heart. If Berkeley is where it’s leading you, then go, Aeir. Nothing here is holding you back. Go.”

“Thanks so much for understanding. I imagined you’d think I was insane.”

“I don’t. Sometimes we stand in our own way and hinder ourselves from the greatness we were destined for. I’ve always seen more for you. That’s why I refused to let you leave this earth without reaching your full potential. Many will think you’re crazy for making such a bold move so soon, but I think you’re brave and beautiful and blessed. Don’t let anything else hold you back, not even you. Now, get that computer and keep busy finding something suitable while I start dinner.”

Nights off for Jae were my favorite because she wouldn’t stay out of the kitchen. She prepared breakfast, lunch, and dinner. The weight I’d lost while in the hospital was beginning to return. If I stayed at Jae’s another week, I was certain it would pile on me in no time.

“Hold the meat,” I whispered, hating to burden her with the idea of another meatless meal, but I had no desire to consume any. Even the thought of it, now, made my stomach turn.

“I don’t know what’s up with you and this no meat campaign, but I guessssss, honey.”

“Sorry. Maybe I do have some side effects from the coma after all, huh?”

“This one, I’ve never heard before. Maybe it’s worth mentioning to the doctor the next time we visit. Hmm?”

“Sure. Or, you could just ask Dr. Joyner.”

“You’re right. I’ll do that during my next shift.”

In true Jae fashion, she skipped her way toward the kitchen and got to work as I pulled the computer onto my lap and resumed my search. She connected her phone to Bluetooth and the sound of Jhene Aiko’s voice came bursting through the speakers. Her proposal to do something dumb while youth was still a factor made the moment and the lyrics much more meaningful.

“Like say ‘f— everyone’… And just run away from our daily routine… Yeah, you know what I mean.”

I bobbed my head, scrolling the hundreds of listings for positions I was uninterested in. Although so much was changing about my identity and who I was, there was one thing that remained the same. I was an educator and would remain one until my dying day. Since a child, I’d been teaching every time an opportunity presented itself—to my dolls, my cousins, my friends, the insects outside, and anyone else who’d listen.

When I graduated from high school, my career path was apparent. College was a breeze, landing me in a classroom by the time I was twenty-two. For six years, and up until the evening a driver crashed into my Toyota, I stood in a classroom from seven in the morning until two-thirty in the evening, five days a week. I loved every second of it, even the trying times that made me question everything but my chosen path.

My eyes began to grow tired as another track spun. I’d lost count of how many songs had started and ended while Jae and I co-existed, doing our own thing. The cabbage, steamed veggies, and rice she’d decided on provided us with a pleasurable aroma.

It wasn’tuntil I stumbled upon the five thousand dollars per month listing that included boarding, meals, and transportation that my interest was piqued and I stopped my scroll. With curious eyes, I scanned the description of the position, tasks, and requirements. There wasn’t a single one on the list that seemed out of the ordinary or unobtainable for me. In fact, the listing lacked complexity and was straightforward.

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