Page 89 of Loved By The Bad Boy

She looks at her girlfriend for support, and Imani nods. “I agree, my lovely potato.”

Mira’s frustrated groan fills the car. Imani and I high-five, laughing at our friend in distress. We exit the car together. Mira seems to know her way around this place, so I follow her lead. Her hands freeze on the door, and she blocks my only way inside. “Why don’t you want to reply?”

“I need to hear from Ben first and my parents, too. But I need to know what Ben thinks.” We always discuss before any of us take a huge step, and replying to Jon seems like a huge one. Mira laughs so hard she snorts. Her gaze falls on me, and her smile wears out when she realizes I’m not kidding. I take a screenshot of the messages and send them to Ben. “He hasn’t seen my text.”

Mira does a double take. I push past her into Imani’s house and pause in the living room. The house smells like scented candles. Imani steps out of the kitchen, holding a jar of water and an empty glass.

“What are you two still discussing?” she asks as she lowers herself into a seat at the dining table.

We join her at the dining table, but Mira beats me to a reply. She starts with a sneer. “Well, Tessa here is waiting to hear fromBenny boybefore she decides what’s good for her future.” There is obvious disdain and emphasis on my boyfriend’s name, which irks me. “Her fucking future.”

I kick her foot under the table. She repays the favor, and we kick each other for a while until Imani slams her cup on the table. “Enough. You two are worse than Lucas and Sam when they bicker.”

Sam bickers? I’m surprised he knows how to use his words. He only speaks when he has to lend his voice during band rehearsals. If it doesn’t involve the band, he won’t say a peep.

Imani’s eyes narrow in warning, but Mira still says, “Babe, she can’t decide her future without Ben.”

“Our future,” I correct. Her statement pricks me the wrong way. It gives a ‘you can’t do anything for yourself’vibe, and I feel an urge to defend myself. I wait for Imani to talk. When she doesn’t, I say, “Ben and I are in a relationship, and it involves two people. It’s no longer about me alone.”

Ben doesn’t do anything important without my knowledge. I don’t need to have an opinion on the matter before he tells me. It’s just… it’s just how we work. Going on the cover of Vogue is huge. But Mira doesn’t seem to understand that. She facepalms, and I feel worse. A little dumb.

“I swear it’s not as crazy as you think, Mira.”

My reply evokes the opposite reaction. Mira sags in her seat, her sigh so heavy and judgmental. I check my phone to see if Ben has replied. He hasn’t. Josef has Ben working on some proposals and finding an apartment for them. I think he’s trying to expand, and the apartment is a great way for the family to be close to Ben. I doubt it’s necessary since Ben won’t be here for long. But he claimed Josef insisted. They would love to own a property in New York for whenever they visit.

I look up to Imani for support or protection from her girlfriend, but she’s focused on her glass of water. Ben won’t say no. That’s what they don’t understand. It’s enough for me to tell him about Jon. The rest of the decision is up to me. He’s like that comforting presence that only interferes when necessary.

“What if he says no, don’t do it?” Mira asks.

Ben has never said no to anything I wanted, nor have I to him. “I’ll try to understand why.”

Tilting her chair back to get a better view of me, Mira crosses her arms over her chest. This feels like an interrogation, and I don’t like it one bit. Mom does things because Dad likes them, and it’s the same with Dad. Those little, maybe unnecessary, things keep their relationship intact.

“What if he doesn’t give a suitable answer?” Her face lights up, and she says, “What if he doesn’t even have a genuine reason for stopping you? Some guys can be that insecure.” Not my Ben. He is confident in me and himself. We are fine. I shake my head, but it only annoys her. She rests a hand atop her chair. “Aren’t you scared of losing yourself to this guy? You are not even married to him?”

I turn to her girlfriend. “Aren’t you going to say anything?”

Imani makes a show of putting on her pink headphones. Her fingers swipe across her tab, and the muffled bass of a sound becomes mildly audible. “Nope. Staying out of this. You two, have fun.”

Mira grins. “Good choice, babe.” She pinches my cheeks, and I swat her hands. “So?”

I spin my phone on the table, using this time to think up a suitable reply. My phone pings with a text from Ben. There are no words, just smiley faces and heart emojis. I can never get used to his random texts and the warmth that follows them. He probably hasn’t downloaded the picture yet.

Bracing my elbows on the table, I turn to Mira with the confidence missing earlier.

“I can’t lose myself if I already belong to him. Ben and I are like soulmates. We belong to each other.” Her jaw unhinges. She stares at me like I have lost my mind. For a fleeting second, I wonder if I made any sense. “So… I can’t lose myself if I’m part of him. And he’s really cool, Mira. He’s supportive. He’ll never say no without a good reason. With him, I can grow and be a better version of myself. And with me, he’s the same. I’m good enough for him, as he is for me.”

“Aw,” Imani coos. She was listening. She grins. “That’s sweet, Tessa. He’s a keeper.”

“Yeah,” Mira grumbles. “You two sound good for each other.”

I blush. “Yeah.” They both stare at me like I’m the best item on a discount sale. I spread my hands on the table, growing shy as I murmur, “I love him. He makes me feel very, very…”

Mira cuts in while I struggle to find the right words. “Okay, we get it. Have you two fucked yet?”

Bitch.

Thirty-Eight

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