Page 29 of Loved By The Bad Boy

“I just sent my mom a text,” I tell him when he’s inside with me. “You can drop me at the hotel.”

They know I’m staying there until our house is fixed, but they don’t know Mom is waiting to meet them.

“Cool,” he answers.

I relax more when Calum grabs a bottle of water from the backseat and finishes half the content. I give him directions to the hotel, but he doesn’t start the car, so we sit in comfortably awkward silence. Pushing one leg over his seat, he screws the cap of the bottle and dumps it at the back.

Now facing me, he runs his fingers over his jaw. I am not sure I enjoy being the center of his attention. It’s a bit overwhelming. “How much longer do you have to stay at the hotel?” he asks.

“A few more days,” I answer. I expected him to say something else. I can’t get over this feeling that he has something else to say. Something I might not like. I shouldn’t have agreed to this boyfriend-girlfriend thing, even for tonight. “Can we go now? We can talk in the hotel’s lobby.”

Calum drags my hands to his lap, and my body jerks forward. I know he’s going to kiss me before his head dips, and I turn right in time for his lips to meet my cheek. Ben is the only one who should have access to my lips. He’s my first and only kiss. I am happy to keep it that way.

A sigh leaves his lips, settling in the air between us like a fog. He lets go of my arms, and I hug myself. I should feel bad, but I’ll feel worse if I let him believe this illusion. It’s just for tonight.

“You kissed him,” he says, tone heavy with sadness and accusation.

I know who he is talking about, and I don’t regret it.

“Yeah.”

“Is he the guy?” Calum asks. I look up. I don’t want to talk about this with him. I switch on the ceiling light. His eyes are red, maybe from the alcohol, and it makes me wonder if he drank because he found out we kissed. “Benjamin Carter, the one who stopped being the right person?”

“What?” I look away from him, but he calls my attention back to him. If this is what he wants to talk about, then I’m fine waiting for Mom to come and get me. “What are you talking about?”

“Your lipstick is smeared, and Benny boy had some of it on his lips.” There’s too much stress on Benny boy. His tone is so vindictive, and it grips me with guilt. I shouldn’t feel guilty because I warned him from the start. Nothing can happen between us. “Was it before or after my song?”

When I open the door, a gush of cold air rushes into the car. “I am leaving.”

“Tessa, wait.” I close my eyes and put my leg back inside. “I am sorry. I think I am in love with you.”

How can you fall in love with someone in such a short time? Maybe he’s drunk. I shut the door and press my knees together. My foot drums into the floor, at first to calm me, until I can’t stop.

“I really like you, Tessa.”

“I told you not to like me,” I snap.

Suffocation claws at my throat. I am torn between staying here to have this conversation with him or running away. Both options make me super uncomfortable. I force myself to keep still.

“The heart wants what it wants, and it wants you.”

Guilt stabs my chest. I want to reach out to Calum for a hug, but I don’t think it will be enough. He sang for me, and the next thing I did was kiss another guy. What happened to introvert Tessa?

“Calum…”

“That day in class when we talked about love and finding the right person, yeah? You said you were not over him,” he murmurs. My pulse quickens. I remember it clearly, and I don’t need a reminder. I hide my hands between my legs. This conversation won’t end well. “Is Ben him?” I dart a desperate gaze at him, hoping he drops this topic. It’s silly. “The boy who stopped being the right person?”

Since he already knows the answer to that question, why is he asking? I rotate my shoulder.

“Yeah,” I whisper.

“Do you still like him?”

Like is not strong of a word to quantify these emotions. Calumthinkshe loves me. That’s not enough. There are no uncertainties about my feelings when it involves Ben. I know it. I feel it in every part of me because I love him without a doubt. I love him even when I want to hate him.

There is no Gracie without Benny.

I look outside the window and murmur, “Just take me to the hotel, Calum. I’m tired.”

---