Page 35 of Loved By The Bad Boy

“He loves you,” she adds.

“He hurt me.”

“You will have to forgive him, you know?” At my silence, she threads her fingers through my hair. “Your dad was going to take us out. But I think we should order in. What do you think?”

I notice her outfit for the first time. A black pencil gown and nude heels. She is dressed for an evening out. If we order in, the chances of bumping into Ben and his family reduces to zero.

“Great idea,” I reply.

Fifteen

If you love someone,let them go. If they ever loved you, they would find their way back to you.

I think that quote is stupid. I think whoever invented it is more stupid. Why would you ever let go of someone you love? Most importantly, why am I thinking about someone I want to forget? I turn and toss on the bed. It’s still not working. I can’t sleep. I throw the comforter off me and sit on the edge of the bed. It’s a few minutes past 5 in the morning, and my alarm is set to ring at 6.

Flipping the corner lamp on, I turn off my alarm and dial Maria’s number. The call rings without interruption. She must have given up on me, and I can’t blame her. There’s only so much a best friend can take. I haven’t called her since we moved to New York, and I have no excuse. I trace the shadow cast on the bed by the lamp. My chest constricts when her voicemail message comes up.

The silence that follows has my thoughts jumping at me. I sit up and hug my knees to my chest. To get away from the voices in my head trying to tear me down for not giving Ben a chance to talk to me, I redial Maria’s number, and she picks up. I almost jump until she speaks.

“Theresa Grace Mower,” she deadpans.

Anger coats her voice, but the only thing I want to do is laugh. Laughter trickles out of my lips. Soon, I’m laughing hysterically. She snorts. “I miss you, Maria.” Maria hisses, and I picture her rolling her eyes. “I know I’m an idiot, the worst person on earth. Don’t be mad at your bestie.”

“Whatever. Are you done being depressed?”

I slide back in bed and tug the comforter over my waist. “I was never depressed. Just sulking.”

I sense a smile in her voice when she says, “Are you okay now, Tessa? Like for real, for real.” I think so. Placing the phone on the pillow, I flip the switch, and darkness falls over the room. It’s not as scary and lonely with Maria to keep me company now. “Heard you are in a band now.”

“Who told you?”

“Who do you think?”

I raise my hands and try to count my fingers in the dark. It’s futile. “Do you two talk?”

“Sometimes. I told him the name of your school.”Go figure, bestie. “Have you spoken to him?”

“No?” I reply.

“Why not?”

Our conversation is beginning to feel like an investigation. It’s surprising to know she told Ben the name of my school. She shouldn’t be talking to him because he broke her best friend’s heart. But I guess since she couldn’t get to me, she had to reach out to my mom to be sure I was okay. It’s the only explanation that makes sense to me. Are they friends now? What do they discuss?

“I dunno,” I reply. She keeps mute. I want her to say something in his favor. “What do you think?”

“That it’s your life, so you have to make the decision yourself.” A small ‘wow’ escapes me, and she giggles. “I’m serious. I want you to talk to him, but it’s up to you. Ben was wrong, but I think it’s worth a shot if he moved all this way for you. Hear him out. Give him another chance.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. We all deserve second chances.” I roll my lip between my teeth. Ben came here for me. I have to talk to him. I owe him that much. Maybe I don’t. “Tessa? I have to go. Call me later?”

“Sure.”

“I don’t believe you.” After eliciting a promise from me, she says, “I love you.”

“I love you too.”

The call ends with a click. I drop my phone on my chest and pretend Ben is here with me. That only works for a few minutes before my eyes snap open. Fine, I’ll talk to him later in the day.

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