Page 72 of Broken By the Bad Boy

Her eyes stay on me the longest, like she’s expecting me to seize this opportunity. I stare at my feet when I feel a familiar gaze on me. Ben. Miss Jota excuses herself, and everyone files out of the hall. For some reason, I can’t move, and neither can Ben. Moments later, it’s just the two of us.

“Will you apply?” Ben asks.

We stare at each other. My shoulders move carelessly in a shrug, and Ben bridges the gap.

“Will you, Gracie?” His voice is a whisper now, and my heart is acting up. “It’s a good choice.”

“It is,” I reply, for lack of better words. “Benny?”

Ben grabs my hand between his and places it on his chest. “I don’t want you to leave me.” My breath hitches when his eyes lift to mine, and a tear rolls down his cheek. I have never seen him cry. My mouth opens without a word. He takes it as his cue to say, “Please, stay here. Don’t go.”

Maddie’s words ring in my ears. I want him to be happy, but I also want to be happy. I push his bag to the floor and straddle him. Ben looks up, tears coat his thick lashes, and my heart beats harder than before.

“You know I love you, right?” My thumbs move across his cheeks, and his lips turn into that cute frown. I kiss and hug him tight. “I applied to NYU, Benny. I have always wanted NYU.”

“Okay.”

That’s all. Nothing more. Nothing else.

Ben’s hand hovers above my butt for a few seconds, and he gives it a firm squeeze. He squeezes me into a bone-crushing hug, as if afraid I’ll disappear. I want to say more to improve the mood, but I don’t want to make any false promises. I rest my head on his shoulder, and Ben sighs again.

Eyes closed, I murmur, “What are your plans?” His hand sneaks into my shirt to stroke my back. My teeth latch onto a spot on his neck, I nibble on it, and he moans his approval. “What will do?”

“Fight?” he says with a shrug. “I have never been to New York.”

“I have.”

Ben rubs my lip with his thumb, wiping off some of my lipstick. “I prefer the red,” he mutters while staring at the purple stain on his finger. I fake a grin. No more purple. “What’s it like?”

I close my eyes and picture the city. We lived there first, but I barely remember any memories from that time. I plan to tour the school with Mom. It’s her alma mater, so she has many good things to say about the school. My eyelids flutter open, and Ben peers at me with sad eyes.

“Not bad. The school is okay,” I say. Ben snorts with laughter, but I can tell he’s slightly pleased with my lack of enthusiasm. I link our fingers, and his face takes on that serious look. “Will you fight the whole year? Please say no. I don’t really want you to keep fighting in that place, babe.”

He snickers. “I’m not sure. I have no plans beyond that.”

By that, he means he hasn’t thought about college, right? Not that he doesn’t have plans for us. I kiss the tip of his nose. He protests, but I don’t offer him an actual kiss. He already got his eight kisses for today.

“Do you not like the idea of college?” If he’s anything like Maria, college is a no. But he is not. Ben wants us to be together, but there are no more talks or plans beyond that. His fingers slide under my shirt. “You are an excellent actor. I think you should apply to SAS. It’s a good option.”

“I guess,” he says. “I’ll be close to Asher if I get the scholarship.” His finger brushes my boobs, and I inhale softly. Ben smirks. I didn’t wear a bra today. “Hey. Do you want to get out of here?”

His tone is suggestive, too seductive. Maybe that’s why I shake my head. “No. Let’s talk.”

Disappointment spreads over his face. “What about?” Anything. Nothing. We haven’t discussed what happens to our relationship after high school. Do we end here? I’ll die of a broken heart. He tips his head back, ogling me through half-lidded eyes. “Do you think we will no longer be close when you leave for NYU?”

“I highly doubt that,” I snap. When Ben’s eyebrows raise, I whisper, “I don’t think so.”

We might not see as much, but we will be close if we put in the effort. We both will.

Ben rests his head on my shoulders. “I don’t think so too.”

I listen to the sound of his breathing. “Can I ask you something?” I whisper.

A moment or two passes. Ben lifts his head from my shoulder. “Ask.”

“You don’t want to go to college because you can’t access your funds now? Because you haven’t given it much of a thought, or you hate the idea of college?” It bothers me that Ben is still on that mission to repay Josef. College will only make it worse. “Ben, please look at me.” My stubborn boyfriend doesn’t. “Benny.” He finally does. “I think New York will be good for you. For us.”

“I don’t want to talk about colleges now,” he says with a note of finality that might have scared me if we were not dating. I fix him with a stern gaze that makes him squirm. “Can we forget it?”

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