Page 4 of Make Me Whole

He didn’t need to continue for me to understand how his daughter’s ex affected our business. As the mayor, Eli had the power and influence to shut us down, suspend our license, and bring a shitstorm our way for no other reason than to punish his estranged wife. For the good of the business, we had to do things right so as to not give any reason for this jerk to use us to manipulate Skylar.

“Shit, man. I didn’t know Skylar had separated,” I muttered, mostly because I didn’t know what else to say.

Al and I were as close as brothers. However, ours was never a talk-about-our-feelings sort of friendship. We worked together, went shooting at the range together, hit the gym together, and enjoyed weekly barbecues and beers together.

Sometimes, we’d even talk about life stuff, dating, and the pros and cons of my rarely getting laid, but the last time we had a serious conversation about feelings and that kind of shit was ten years ago when Margery died in childbirth and I was left at a complete loss for how to care for my newborn son, Aiden.

To be honest, I couldn’t remember asking even once how Skylar was doing since she got pregnant and married right out of high school. That was nearly eight years ago.

Al was an immature idiot, but I was a shitty friend.

He shrugged as if it was no big deal. He’d always known how my wife’s death left me broken and gutted. How Margery’s love for the boy was the only thing that kept me somewhat alive after she left and how Aiden was now my sole lifeline. I'd pushed everyone but my son away so that I would never be that hurt again. Still, knowing his family just went through something that hard and I wasn’t there for him—and for Skylar—made me feel like the old rat shit sitting inside the house we'd just agreed to buy.

“She never told me details about what happened. She just showed up at the house one night with a small suitcase for her and the kid and an outfit that covered her so much it made her look like a nun even though it was a hundred degrees.”

The anger in Al’s voice made my blood boil as well. Since my house was in Pine Creek, the next town over, I did not know who Eli was, but everything in me wanted to find out just so I could hurt him bad enough that he’d have to dress like a nun to cover the damage.

Without thinking, I said, “If you want me to find the asshole and break something, I’m not opposed. I’ll make it look like an accident.”

That comment earned me a laugh. It relieved some of the shit feeling. Not all of it, though.

“Thanks, man. But as good as it would be to see that little shit busted, I don’t think that’s what Sky needs. Actually, I have no idea what she needs,” he added, looking much older than our forty-nine years. “All I know is that my girl doesn’t feel like herself. She’s always been happy and peppy and hopeful, and now it’s like the world is dark and she’s always sad and mopey.

“I see the effort she makes to be normal around Ella. That alone is a testament to how good of a mother she is to that little girl despite the crap example Louisa set, but I know her better than that. I can see the pain in her eyes, the distrust and disillusion, and it kills me. You’re a dad, so you know. All we want is for our kids to be happy, safe, and healthy, and when they’re not, it’s like a limb has fallen off.”

I nodded because he was right. As a father, happiness, safety, and health were the only things I’ve ever truly wanted for Aiden. I also knew the pain of seeing such deep sadness in your child’s eyes and how it kills a piece of your soul.

My son got that look every time he saw another kid being hugged by their mom. In the past ten years, it has never failed to pierce me with intense guilt at the knowledge that it was my inability to deal with the loss of his mother and marry someone else that kept him from the opportunity of being loved by a mother.

At that moment, as sad as I was for my friend, I also envied him because even though he was living every parent's nightmare, at least he wasn’t the reason Skylar was suffering. At least he didn’t know that pain.

“If there’s something, anything—violent or non-violent—I can do to help, I’m here for you. For all of you.”

He smiled again and thanked me, but it didn’t touch his eyes.

We steered the conversation away from the serious stuff and back to the safety of business as we continued walking toward our cars. We stopped next to Al’s Jeep and completed our bid for the house. Then, we discussed some plans for the reno and the permits we’d need.

The sun was low in the sky when we said goodbye. I was almost to my truck when Al called my name. It wasn’t a normal ‘I forgot to tell you something’ holler. Nope, it was a hysterical‘I just got a lightbulb moment’kind of call.

I turned to look at my friend and chuckled at the way his brows shot up like a cartoon character's. “I know what you can do,” he said, the same excitement dripping from his voice.

I tilted my head in confusion. “In the reno?”

He shook his head. “No, to help Skylar.”

“Oh,” I said and nodded. “Anything.”

“Come over the house on Saturday with Aiden. We’ll throw some burgers on the grill and have some beers while the kids have a bit of fun. I think that relaxing and seeing her daughter being a carefree kid will be good for Sky. I know it’ll be good for me.”

Despite my reservations about putting Aiden in the position of watching a kid with a mother, I readily agreed to the gathering. Maybe it wouldn’t be that bad for him. Maybe seeing another kid with a single parent would give him a feeling of normalcy.

Also, it would be nice to see Skylar again, especially with her being another heartbroken adult like her dad and me. We could all hate on love and relationships together, and maybe, just maybe, we all wouldn’t feel as lonely and broken as we did. If only for a moment.

2

SKY

My eyelids fluttered open, eyes and brain still fogged. For a few seconds I just lay in the twin bed I'd had since freshman year of high school and enjoyed the blissful nothingness of a barely awake brain. I had no conscious thoughts, just faded images of my dreams, and they had been such wonderful dreams. In that dream world, I wasn’t a single mother, divorced at twenty-six, with no degree or useful skill and no hope for better days. I had my shit together, and I was happy.

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